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United states takes over Greenland. Greenland people not USA citizens. Deported coz not citizens.
Sorry I got a bone spur, cant join the (US) military.
(are they gone yet? 👀)
I still have my fingers crossed that RFK accidentally gives him some kind of super ebola that causes his anus to melt
He’ll just wear a bigger diaper then. A huuuge diaper, absolutely tremendous. The biggest in the world.
gesticulates with tiny hands to indicate gargantuan size
Kinda incredible how quickly he pivoted from, “We’re gonna stop spending billions on all these wars,” to, “Fuck it, I feel like invading Greenland.”
I feel like if they make good on their threat of exiting NATO we’ll soon see the US invade an “ally”
It’s fucking insane. Even MAGAs didn’t vote for this. He just suddenly started talking about taking over Greenland and making Canada a state between the election and the inauguration, and the billionaires are just trying to extract whatever wealth they can out of our government before grandpa drives the car into a ditch.
No. They won’t.
Are we minions? Really? Like the entire USA doesn’t have a way to remove this guy on a technicality at least? …to be president you must also be 7ft tall or younger than 65y? Must fit thru a 12" wide slot without extruding internal organs? Something! Maybe hair must be exactly 27um thick at the root and this must be measured after a hefty meal.
Like the entire USA doesn’t have a way to remove this guy on a technicality at least?
If the entire US wanted him gone, he wouldn’t have taken off to begin with. The problem is that big swaths of the country are absolutely Q-pilled on this guy. They genuinely believe his schtick (thanks, in no small part, to a fully compliant corporate media and a complicit religious movement).
Past that, there’s a mushy middle that feels utterly powerless. I’m sitting here on my couch in Houston. I don’t have any way to get rid of my shitty mayor, much less my fascist President. The issue isn’t finding a technicality. The issue is that bureaucrats in the US aren’t seriously interested in doing a coup. Comey/Mueller aren’t coming to save anyone. Hell, much of the police state is in the bag for this guy in one way or another. We’ve got enough Pam Bondis and Tulsi Gabbards and Ken Paxtons and Pete Hegseths and Michael Flynns bouncing around the branches of government that nominally provide national security to buffer out the opposition.
It comes down to the fundamental problem of the American system of governance. We weren’t that far off the mark from outright fascism under Reagan or Truman. Trump’s crassness and ignominity are not, themselves, sufficient to get him removed from office. He’ll get away with trying to seize control of Greenland for the same reason Bush Jr got away with invading Iraq and LBJ got away with invading Vietnam and McKinley got away with invading the Philippines. Because this is who we are as a country. We’re a big military that steals shit from the periphery to enrich the elites in our imperial core.
We’re an Imperial Power full of violent, invasion-loving thugs, rapists, and looters. We’re doing what we’ve always done.
Engaged in rebellion? 14th amendment
Trump is making it unsafe for Americans to travel across the globe. Seriously if he keeps making these hostile statements some person with mental health issues will snap and attack American tourists in Denmark.
Prepare for a lot of fake Canadians.
Easy test, make fun of the usa in front of them. Any Canadian worth their salt will join in (more so now a days), but most americans can not seem to do so without mentioning weird colours and parties.
Jokes on you I love making fun of big fat idiot Americans.
Maybe he’s counting on it
These Yanks will be putting Canada flag patches on their luggage again.
We need to develop a purity test to weed out the fake Canadians trying to come to our countries and steal our sanity. Somebody give me a shibboleth - something Americans can’t pronounce properly but Canadians can.
Canurope first!
Just ask them about health care insurance…
When you go to a hospital on the verge of death, do the medical staff A: Save your life B: Ask for your health insurance details C: Accuse you of trying to abort a foetus and call the cops while you bleed out in the waiting room ?
Oh that way you can also find out how deep in the states they are from. I like it.
hes gonna find ya
He’s gonna gitchya, gitchya, gitchya, gitchya…
One way or another!
How about using his powers of imagination then? The mind is the mightiest province of all (until dementia lays waste to it of course).
I’m still convinced he only wants Greenland because it looks big on a map.
Gaslight Obstruct (Mercator) Project
Putin wants it. That’s why this is happening.
The assumption should never be that Trump wants a thing but that Putin wants it.
Somebody’s feeding him grandiose ideas about global warming and northern sea routes. Probably some flattering lies about splitting said routes between them and dominating world trade too, once Canada and the EU are out of the way.
True, same reason he’s hung up on the Panama canal (and why they always get brought up together)
To be fair, China has been investing in thawing sea routes for a while, though largely to free themselves from having to pass through the US-controlled South China Sea.
Excuse me? South America Sea*
Wait… South America is already a thing.
But not a sea! I’m guessing it works like email addresses… As long as someone else doesn’t have it, you can make it your own
Can’t imagine Trump would be happy keeping the word “South”. I think you may need to iterate on that.
Trump loves the south. It’s where he gets all his rubes.
I don’t see how thawing seas help China unless they’re planning on retaking Outer Manchuria from Russia?
I believe the correct term these days is Personchuria
Not sure what Manchuria has to do with it … the Chinese are looking for a sea route to deliver goods to Europe.
So they would go north to avoid US control, passing through [checks notes] the US/Japan-controlled East China Sea and the US-controlled Bering Strait?
Thereby avoiding multiple tight spots and shaving over two weeks off the travel time, yes. And it’s not a secret either.
If it’s just to avoid navigation hazards and save time, what was your point in mentioning that the South China Sea is “US-controlled?”
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Literally haven’t heard of that name before.
It has room to move people into as climate change makes living in the equatorial regions difficult.
It has a bunch of minerals the USA could use.
It houses a NATO base that if it were in Russia’s hands would make it easier for Russia to eventually project force westward.
There are reasons for America to want Greenland. They all happen to be evil which Im fairly positive is a side benefit for the current administration.
Or, he recognises that arctic and subarctic territories are going to be worth much more in the future because of global warming. Trump is a major scatterbrain but in general it looks like he’s acting impulsively based on pieces of trivia, some of them being correct. Not that I agree with proposed solution to the issue but not everything he does is entirely dumb and those are very rarely inconsistent with his own interests.
He’s not acting entirely on his own, he had handlers with a plan.
He’s filthy rich now that he’s running a crypto scam for taking in bribes, so I wouldn’t say those are handlers rather than revenue streams. Other people are not in control of Trump, he’s a human wrecking ball that confuses theatre for politics, similar to general population that elected him.
Perfect plan: support fossile fuels, eliminate renuables, buy Greenland, gain the profits from global warming and melting ice.
Renew
He is dumb enough for that to be utterly believable.
Damn you web mercator projection! If only Robinson projection was the default on google/apple/whatever trump uses -map.
To be fair even on a globe Greenland is still massive. Just not quite as bad on Mercator.
It is also mostly ice. The entirety of the central Greenland is covered by 1.6km to 3.7km thick ice.
Settlements are around the coast, as Greenland has about 100km roads in total, no railroads and no inland water.
Republicans hate railroads, so that’s actually a plus for them.
Yeah but on mercator it looks bigger than Africa. Africa is actually really huge
Edit: wording.
Just casually threatening war with NATO. From Mr “yOuR ThReAtEnInG wOrLd WaR 3” less than a week ago
Listen I don’t believe Greenland has ever worn a suit.
And I don’t think Greenland ever thanked Trump for being such a good partner. Very disrespectful!
What you mean is Greenland is playing with world war 3?
It’s not playing cards
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Casually saying crazy shit is actually about 90% of Trump’s personality though. Still waiting for him to lock up Hilary.
You don’t think he would if he could? I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised if he did.
Probably a good thing that she still has Secret Service protection. Like Pence.
It’s not war when Trump does it. It’s liberation.
That same liberation under a Democrat would have them begging the Hague to arrest the sitting president.
Or USSR when they “liberated” Poland!
I don’t think Trump “liberated” anybody during his first term, so I guess he wants to check that off his bucket list?
And the Republicans in the audience chuckled when he said it.
If they would offer everyone in Greenland 1million that would be about 56 billion right? If you have friends with deep pockets…
I can’t wait for the “Donald Trump hiding place” memes.
It’s just going to be a bathroom in March of Legos. Or somewhere near where he buried
evidencean ex-wife.He’s not clever enough for the air hole…
I mean he could hide in the pattern buffer…
Buried classified documents. There’s no way he put an ex wife on his property without them being buried under porta potties.
Is it so he can give it to Russia as a forward operating base for future invasions?
