Prepositions are hard, and these are the ones that confuse me the most:

  • It seems (…) [to / for] me
  • It looks like (…) [to / for] me
  • It feels (…) [to / for] me
  • It sounds like (…) [to / for] me
  • (…) makes more sense [to / for] me

Questions:

  • Are both valid?
    • If both are valid; is there any nuance as to which to use?
    • If they aren’t: is there a general rule or is it a case-by-case (as it usually is with prepositions)?

Thanks!

      • Hawke@lemmy.worldEnglish
        3·
        1 year ago

        Yes. The only case I can think of where I might say “for me” in one of those is talking about an inevitable future event where I have no real choice.

        e.g. if I only have beans in my cupboard, I might reasonably say “it looks like beans for me [for supper tonight]”. Or if I am sure I will die soon, “it seems like the end for me.”

        • Pat@kbin.run
          4·
          1 year ago

          As a native English speaker it always blows my mind when people explain the unwritten rules. I know there’s a reason some things sound more “proper” than others but just think “that’s the way it is” without understanding the core reasoning. I feel like I had an epiphany after reading this lol

        • Crul@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
          3·
          1 year ago

          That makes sense!
          So “for me” implies something is forced upon you, and it has nothing to do with what your opinion is about that thing… right?

          Thanks!

          • Hawke@lemmy.worldEnglish
            3·
            1 year ago

            Yes, exactly!

            Although I could express an opinion if I put “for me” first. Like “for me, beans are the worst meal ever”.

  • dmention7@lemm.eeEnglish
    3·
    1 year ago

    I am no grammarologist, but here is my take:

    “To me” implies you are more passive, and that the thing is happening to you.

    “For me” implies that you have some active part in experiencing the thing.

    All the cases you described feel more natural as a “to me” scenario, but I can imagine instances where “for me” would be used to emphasize that it is your opinion or your experience.

    Not sure if that clarified anything at all 🤷‍♂️

  • asterisk@lemmy.worldEnglish
    3·
    1 year ago

    For me, “for me” is more subjective than “to me”, suggesting there may be other equally valid points of view.

    But I would never say “It seems for me”, or the other items in your list except for “…makes more sense for me…”.

    • Crul@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      What I’m getting is that using “to me” as the default is a safe option and the use of “for me” is more nuanced (… and I don’t understand in which sense).

      Thanks!

      • asterisk@lemmy.worldEnglish
        4·
        1 year ago

        Yes, that seems about right to me.

        I can’t quite put my finger on the rule for when you can use “for me”; perhaps there isn’t one.

        I do think, however, that you can safely put “For me,” at the beginning of the sentence instead of using “to me” later: “For me, it seems…”, “For me, it looks like…”, etc.