I can barely remember everything that’s blown my mind. Seeing everything that I’ve felt, that’s made me feel so isolated from other people because I can’t explain it, or they just don’t understand is crazy. Especially Echolalia. I literally can’t go for a few seconds without quoting something. Especially Red Dead Redemption 2. Saying “sure” has never been the same after playing that game lol. Reading through this has blown my mind. It’s like reading out my thoughts. Thanks for the support.
I’ve definitely started doubting and questing things that I think and feel. I recently quit a job I had been working at for about 4 years, not because of autism just moving on. And on the last day I kept thinking “this is the last time I get to do X”. Then I realized that I don’t care, like at all about it being my last time, this whole time I’ve been doing this because I see other people do it. It’s so weird to go through this process and realize that almost my entire life has been a facade, it’s a good weird, it’s an answer to why I’ve felt this way, but weird nonetheless.