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The followers of ex-president CheetoFace McHowler-monkey are so desperate to come up with excuses for his obvious criminality that they’ve latched to to a really idiotic conspiracy theory. In other news, water is wet.

Summary:

1. Mark is working on a tentacle beast guy and wants to fix the foot.
2. Trump was convicted on all 34 counts in his criminal hush money trial.
3. Maga people are upset and looking for excuses to deny that Trump is a scumbag.
4. Someone posted on Facebook that they knew the verdict in advance.
5. Conservatives and Maga people are claiming that this is proof of jury misconduct and that there should be a mistrial.
6. Fox News is reporting on the Facebook post and speculating about a mistrial.
7. True believers in the Trump Cult of Personality don’t need a rational explanation to believe anything.
8. Conservative Twitter is full of reactions to the news.