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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/randomthro1234 on 2023-06-29 20:02:31+00:00.


My fiancée (30F) and I (29M) have been planning our wedding for over a year now. Fiancée has a HUGE family- siblings, tons of cousins, aunts and uncles, second cousins, family over seas, etc. I have a much smaller family. Fiancée said from the jump that she wanted us to be financially secure to get married, as it’s important to her to include her entire family in the wedding. We’re doing pretty well financially, but I still think it’s absurd to include so many guests, some of whom aren’t even blood relatives just “family friends”. She agreed to exclude her overseas family, but she claims everyone else is too “near and dear” to exclude. I tried to compromise and say just her aunts, uncles, and first cousins, but she claims her second cousins are considered just as immediate as the others and she grew up with them too. As of now, her guest list alone is over 60 people, not including her/our friends. I told her to get her list down to 25, and she was upset, saying she has even more than 25 FIRST COUSINS and that few guests is impossible for her. She said we can afford it, and she brought up how I agreed when we got engaged to have a larger wedding. I said that’s true, but I didn’t know she was so serious about it, and I thought she’d be open to compromise as we continued planning. It just doesn’t make sense to me to spend so much money on a huge wedding, especially since I barely know most of those people. She says she grew up with them so it’s important, but I just don’t get why we shouldn’t put that money towards something better, like the honeymoon. She’s been sulking and talking to her sisters, but I think I’m being fair. AITA?