tfw you have a few months left in savings and finally get around to looking up disability and it’s all “we’ll get around to it in 6-9 months.”

🪦

  • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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    7 days ago

    Yes, every day.

    The only hopes are:

    • getting enough adrenaline from stress to end the cycle (super harmful in the long run)
    • completely let it go no matter the importance & hope that randomly without thinking about it and doing something else (perhaps being stuck in the same loop but for another topic) I’ll just be ok to immediately drop everything and just start executing the first step … then it usually goes on ok after that
    • get someone to help me, then think about how much of a drag Im being on their personal life, alienate them “for their own good and happiness”, have a copy of them in my mind for years to come hopefully the example will sometimes magically help me with some current issue
    • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 days ago

      getting enough adrenaline from stress to end the cycle (super harmful in the long run)

      That’s me! I’m pretty sure my baseline cortisol levels could kill a small animal. Also pretty sure sustaining that level has done permanent damage to my body.

      • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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        7 days ago

        Yes.
        And there is absolutely no way a neurotypical person can comprehend that.

        That’s why a crisis (a “stressful situations” by normies definitions) calms us down and/or we continue to function normally. And normies just panic. And even when it’s obvious to us what is best to do next, we have to wait for them to calm tf down to even understand what we are saying. But by then the advantage is lost.

        (“Oh, so we are going with the plan I proposed and detailed in an email last week but this time is “your” idea?” … :|)

    • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      One thing I’ve found that helps “motivate” me to do an undesired task is to find another, more undesirable, task that needs to be done and convincing myself it needs to be done immediately. Then I avoid the new task, and do the original task instead.

      60% of the time it works 100% of the time.

      • Evil_Shrubbery@lemm.ee
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        7 days ago

        Yeah, task switching in general kinda works for me sometimes, it makes no difference to me how (un)desired the task is. Even tasks I enjoy are hard for me.

        • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          Yes, I suffer from that too. It can be as small as using the bathroom or getting another drink, to putting my woodworking hobby on indefinite hold.

          If I complete one task in a day, I feel accomplished.

          • Szyler@lemmy.world
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            1 day ago

            My phone has literally died many times because I wouldn’t plug it in, with the charger cable *being within reach! *

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    7 days ago

    Stimulants help a lot. Sometimes, I’ll catch myself getting motivated for the wrong task, though. I also have to force myself to eat sometimes. Lastly, I’d have a heart attack if I ever drank coffee.

    I’m prescribed methylphenidate lr. It’s a lot less intense than amphetamines.

    • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.netOP
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      7 days ago

      I went though just about every stimulant on the market about 20 years ago. Most did nothing, but a couple had me going through panic attacks for routine work issues. After two years on the pharma-go-round I’d had enough. I got this far in life rawdogging reality. How bad can it get?

      Narrator: Yes.

      • Atherel@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        7 days ago

        Did you try again? Bodies change, I was in a group therapy where one guy said that meds didn’t help him when he was a kid, but now 15 years later he tried again and they work. Can be a big help.

        • MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.netOP
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          7 days ago

          Working on it. My current psych seems pretty set on “getting the depression under control” before tackling the ADHD. My dude… it’s all knotted up, Gordian style.

          • dohpaz42@lemmy.world
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            7 days ago

            I’ve been there too. I have three therapists: one that prescribes my antidepressants, one that prescribes my adhd meds, and the one I talk to about all my problems.

            For both my meds (cymbalta for depression, and straterra for adhd) I am being overprescribed the recommended doses because my body/metabolism sucks like that.

            Good luck to you! Once you get it dialed in, it’s nice. Not perfect, but better than raw-dogging it.

          • Atherel@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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            7 days ago

            Ah damn, that’s a bummer. I mean yes ADHD is a diagnosis that you only get when other mental diagnoses are excluded where the same symptoms can appear, one of them being depression. But if you already had that diagnosis years ago that’s just counterproductive. Hope you find ways to manage this without meds in a okish way.

  • Auf dem Sprung 🌻@troet.cafe
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    7 days ago

    @MelodiousFunk Absolutely right! I do apologize, but in my current life practice there is one more sentence at the end. I’ve been working hard to find it.

    Zen Buddhism: If the bar is too high, go under it.

    (Because. These are magic words too.) #SelfCare

    If this means doing nothing or weeping a lot or using lots of stimulants or looking for someone who can help me: why not. It’s okay.