EFFORT POST
Fuuuuuuuuuck. Am I being too āall or nothingā about this?
After holding my third corporate job (for going on 6 months now), itās all the fucking same. And itās going to be damn hard to convince me otherwise. Always a fucking business started by some CEO whose parents are rich, and they say thereās an opportunity to make your way up the ladder and other opportunities for career growth (devoting your entire existence to capital in this squid game esque way is truly draconian but I digress), though funny how they donāt mention all the nepotistic hierarchies in between which are akin to high school cliques. Seems like such a brazenly obvious (and extremely normalized) pyramid scheme. But hey, you get nearly a six figure salary for producing 0 value to any humans whatsoever in the computer touching factory because someone is in the position to shuffle around capital. But donāt you talk about a raise unless itās the year end! You have to know that youāre paid based on the very real idea of āmarket value.ā
Then you have service workers, care takers, social workers and the like. Since those careers are not contributing to the L I N E in any meaningful way (though itās becoming more common with the plague on humanity that is private equity), they pay a lot less. I donāt know if there is enough evidence to say that itās a āpunishmentā by capitalists or whatever, but Iām starting to think that it really doesnāt matter.
You reframe it in both contexts though, and itās exactly that. If you pay a computer-toucher significantly more than someone caring for humans in the world, the value judgment could not be more clear. I donāt know why Iām acting surprised, I lived through Covid and saw these people (who undeniably showed their importance) being shat on relentlessly. Thereās stuff Iāve been trying to unsee for years and I just fucking canāt anymore. Talk about man-made horrors beyond your comprehension
I need to bite the bullet and get the fuck out but how the hell do you enter the biggest phase of change in your life when you follow the same patterns each and every day?
I agree but consider this about getting out: Whether you want to become a healthcare worker, an artist, a cook, or anything else that actually helps the people immediately around you, then increasingly you are going to have to operate under corporate management that somehow manages to corrupt the good left in these jobs. And that means youāre going to feel less like youāre helping, and then youāre just working for another corporate master for even less pay.
Maybe it would ultimately be more comforting to find ways to use that extra $60,000 in the office job to support people organizing in your community, leftist groups working in other areas, etc. I donāt know and Iām not going to judge you one way or another, itās just food for thought.
I hope you can find a happy and healthy balance with your work life soon.
My M.O. is to throw myself right into the deep end and just deal with the consequences as they pop up. Iāve had a lot of good outcomes. But Iāve also accrued a fair amount of trauma pursuing those outcomes.
If only I could unsee everything Iāve seen and unlearn everything Iāve learned
Yeah, I know the feeling. Iāve thought the same thing on many occasions.