That’s one I can’t do. I feel like I have to be stoic all the time in person, because I’m a big guy, and I’m unattractive so I have to maintain something to be, idk, respected? I have to really know a person before I can allow myself to be silly around them. My last “boyfriend” cemented that in, too. He dumped me and said he couldn’t deal with the “cutesy shit” took me a while to get past that one. Not the guy, so much. I felt like I had found something I never thought I’d have, and then ending it by saying that… Cut deep.
And I’m lucky on the friend front. I have a lot of long term friendships online, but I also have a few very close IRL friends, and I’m extremely close with my family.
Do you have anyone you can be passionate about things with?
No, I definitely get it. Maybe not exactly the same, but I have been traumatised enough to learn to present myself like an amicable, calm guy(masking culture, limiting my energy levels). I definitely need to get close to someone to allow that side of myself to get out, but sometimes it just comes out without my control if I really feel comfortable. But yeah, the comfort only comes out when I really trust someone.
One of my exes definitely cemented it in too. Shaming me for some behaviors 💀 Then, another ex praised my silliness, so it helped me come out of my shell a bit more. Nowadays I feel like I let out just enough to be a “fun, chill guy”.
Sorry to hear about that cutesy shit comment. That really sucks. If it wasn’t his thing, that’s fine, but to bring you down for it is just a fuckin asshole move. (I’m a proud user of the :3 face lol, it just represents that cheeky cute emotion perfectly)
Glad to hear you have good connections. That’s really what life is about I think. Building connections with others and building yourself up (knowledge, hobbies, wisdom, etc)
I do have my few IRL friends too. 2 really long term ones that have never failed me, another couple stray friends from jobs I’ve had, and most recently a group of musician friends I met last year. It’s the kind of “guy friendgroup” connection I’d been lacking for many years, and they’re all just as weird and hyper-knowledgable in their respective special interests lol. I just love people like that!
I’ve never had that sort of bro-y guy group, but it’s also not something I long for…I’m glad you’ve got it, though! It seems super valuable to those who want it. I just can’t watch football. Lmao
That’s one I can’t do. I feel like I have to be stoic all the time in person, because I’m a big guy, and I’m unattractive so I have to maintain something to be, idk, respected? I have to really know a person before I can allow myself to be silly around them. My last “boyfriend” cemented that in, too. He dumped me and said he couldn’t deal with the “cutesy shit” took me a while to get past that one. Not the guy, so much. I felt like I had found something I never thought I’d have, and then ending it by saying that… Cut deep.
And I’m lucky on the friend front. I have a lot of long term friendships online, but I also have a few very close IRL friends, and I’m extremely close with my family.
Do you have anyone you can be passionate about things with?
No, I definitely get it. Maybe not exactly the same, but I have been traumatised enough to learn to present myself like an amicable, calm guy(masking culture, limiting my energy levels). I definitely need to get close to someone to allow that side of myself to get out, but sometimes it just comes out without my control if I really feel comfortable. But yeah, the comfort only comes out when I really trust someone.
One of my exes definitely cemented it in too. Shaming me for some behaviors 💀 Then, another ex praised my silliness, so it helped me come out of my shell a bit more. Nowadays I feel like I let out just enough to be a “fun, chill guy”.
Sorry to hear about that cutesy shit comment. That really sucks. If it wasn’t his thing, that’s fine, but to bring you down for it is just a fuckin asshole move. (I’m a proud user of the :3 face lol, it just represents that cheeky cute emotion perfectly)
Glad to hear you have good connections. That’s really what life is about I think. Building connections with others and building yourself up (knowledge, hobbies, wisdom, etc)
I do have my few IRL friends too. 2 really long term ones that have never failed me, another couple stray friends from jobs I’ve had, and most recently a group of musician friends I met last year. It’s the kind of “guy friendgroup” connection I’d been lacking for many years, and they’re all just as weird and hyper-knowledgable in their respective special interests lol. I just love people like that!
I’ve never had that sort of bro-y guy group, but it’s also not something I long for…I’m glad you’ve got it, though! It seems super valuable to those who want it. I just can’t watch football. Lmao
Yeah, it’s less like football bro-y and more like send each other memes and play video games and make music together:)
That sound amazing!