Doug Holland@lemmy.worldM to AMUSING, INTERESTING, OUTRAGEOUS, or PROFOUND@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 day agoProblem solved.lemmy.worldimagemessage-square226fedilinkarrow-up1628arrow-down129
arrow-up1599arrow-down1imageProblem solved.lemmy.worldDoug Holland@lemmy.worldM to AMUSING, INTERESTING, OUTRAGEOUS, or PROFOUND@lemmy.worldEnglish · 1 day agomessage-square226fedilink
minus-squarenooneescapesthelaw@mander.xyzlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up21arrow-down2·9 hours agoWhy would I want to join Canada??? I don’t do well in the cold smh my head
minus-squareMaple Engineer@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up34·edit-28 hours ago-Life expectancy will go up from a world ranking of 48th (USA) to 20th (Canada). -Education will get better from 31st (USA) to 19th (Canada). -Math scores will improve from 34th (USA) to 9th (Canada). -Robberies will go down from 98 per 100,000 population to 62. -Traffic accident deaths will drop from 12.7 per 100,000 to 5.3. -You will spend half as much on health care yet get better outcomes. -Poverty in Canada is 1/3 the rate in the USA. -Although Canada has fewer millionaires, we more fairly distribute wealth (better income equality). -The minimum wage in Canada is double that in USA. and most important you will be happier (Canada ranked 15th, USA 23rd in happiness). (We couldn’t find a politeness index, but thank you for reading)
minus-squareprole@lemmy.blahaj.zonelinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up1·edit-27 minutes agoImagine how much worse all of those statistics will get once they absorb large chunks of the US!
minus-squareSnapz@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up5arrow-down3·7 hours agoIs this an unlabeled bad joke that’s too close to what an actual idiot would say in real life?
minus-squareKazumara@discuss.tchncs.delinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up2·edit-24 hours agoWe are on Lemmy, so it’s mostly still save to assume the first case I actually liked the joke too
Why would I want to join Canada??? I don’t do well in the cold smh my head
-Life expectancy will go up from a world ranking of 48th (USA) to 20th (Canada).
-Education will get better from 31st (USA) to 19th (Canada).
-Math scores will improve from 34th (USA) to 9th (Canada).
-Robberies will go down from 98 per 100,000 population to 62.
-Traffic accident deaths will drop from 12.7 per 100,000 to 5.3.
-You will spend half as much on health care yet get better outcomes.
-Poverty in Canada is 1/3 the rate in the USA.
-Although Canada has fewer millionaires, we more fairly distribute wealth (better income equality).
-The minimum wage in Canada is double that in USA.
and most important you will be happier (Canada ranked 15th, USA 23rd in happiness).
(We couldn’t find a politeness index, but thank you for reading)
Imagine how much worse all of those statistics will get once they absorb large chunks of the US!
How are you now ✋
Good and you
Not s’bad
Is this an unlabeled bad joke that’s too close to what an actual idiot would say in real life?
We are on Lemmy, so it’s mostly still save to assume the first case
I actually liked the joke too