Recently I read through the comments on a post and someone suggested OP should „just read the room“.

I have been told this since I was young and it triggers me every time.

Being unaware of social dynamics in a situation is a thing a lot of autistic people I know struggle with. „Reading the room“ in my understanding means „becoming aware of the unspoken things in a situation“.

Collins dictionary says: If you say that someone reads the room, you mean that they understand their audience and adapt what they say to suit it.

I think, although not on purpose, saying this is massively ableist and making fun of someone for „not reading the room“ is harassment imo.

Feel free to give an opposing opinion as well. I would like to hear them.

  • Haui@discuss.tchncs.deOP
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    9 months ago

    I‘m not sure I understand what you‘re trying to say, sorry.

    In autistic people we call this mind blindness. I‘m gifted and for me, all people are gifted and are deliberately not getting what I get which frustrates the hell out of me.

    But I choose to leave them be. I wish they would do the same for me. :)

    • HobbitFoot @thelemmy.club
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      6
      ·
      9 months ago

      People might not understand they are being abelist because they are going to view other people through how they act. They may not understand how someone can be mind blind or face blind.

      I also say understand because people may “know” something, but that doesn’t mean they understand it.

      • Haui@discuss.tchncs.deOP
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        ·
        9 months ago

        Makes total sense! Thank you for mentioning it. I think we are often assuming malice when incompetence is more likely.