• Narri N.@lemmy.ml
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    10 hours ago

    This is what enables me to gaslight myself into thinking I must not be a proper neurodivergent, as I do not spend all my days playing (insert whateverthefuck it is today that is considered the most autistic), while simultaneously believing that Dwarf Fortress is and will probably forever be the best game ever made, and shaming myself for not being immediately capable of playing something like Aurora 4X without going through any tutorials.

    spoiler

    It’s kinda sad, actually, how society has gaslighted me into thinking that because I was born at the time and the place I was, and because of the culture and socioeconomical ladder that my parents inhabited at the time, and because I was assigned to the gender that I was; and because of the certain traits I showed growing up - while at the same time completely disregarding every other trait - that there are only certain stereotypes that I feel I must fit into, even within neurodivergence, and if I don’t fill those roles I myself will feel like a failure. I think most problems (labeled with varying diagnoses in the ICD-10, including but not limited to: paranoid schizophrenia, psychotic depression, borderline personality disorder, social anxiety disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, etc.) that have arisen in my life are because of these things that society has imposed on me, without ever even asking for my own preference and never taking me seriously when I tell of them. Psychiatry is a fucking joke like that, because no-one in that so-called “field of science” took me seriously regarding neurodivergence until like maybe two or three years ago, once my sister was diagnosed with ADHD. Instead they claimed that “it would have been noticed by now”. Yeah you should know, you absolute fucking quack, you goddam charlatan. Keep selling me your fucking snake-oils that do fuck all, except make me unable to get an erection or cum, and only fuck my brain up with electric-feeling zaps if I miss a dose. You fucking fuckwit.

    thankfully none of that matters haha lol let’s go gaymerzzzzz

    • snugglesthefalse@sh.itjust.works
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      9 hours ago

      Dwarf fortress is one of those games I keep going back to. Aurora is similar but I can see how it’d be more opaque. DF premium means I’ve had to relearn years of muscle memory though.