Greetings from Finland! I got my vasectomy yesterday at the age of 30. Starting from that age a Finn can get sterilized with just the approval of the doctor that’s going to perform that surgery. That procedure was a huge relief in my life. It may sound weird to some but I rejected all kinds of intimate interest from women (even though I am a hetero male) until this point in life mostly because I always, since childhood, had that nagging fear of procreating which is something I really want to avoid as one could see 😃 Girls must have kind of thought I just don’t really like females or something 🤣 Temporary contraception to prevent pregnancy is too unreliable to me in my personal case; I don’t want a relationship where I would constantly worry about contraception failing. The contraceptive items could break, I couldn’t know for sure if a woman has used her contraceptives; and some female contraceptives would carry too big of a health risk to her (I just cannot tolerate those risks to my prospective lady but want to cherish her).

I’ll just have to wait a few months to hopefully get a negative lab test to show there are no cells to create offspring in that stuff. Then I can finally start looking for a spouse without fear of pulling a trolley around the balcony later on. I have realized lately that a relationship usually just doesn’t work (not all cases of all people are such, however) if one of the partners is a childfree-minded individual and the other is not. So I think the only way to find happiness and longevity with a spouse in my case is to find a partner who is sterilized, too. I just know of too many cases of a person telling to their not-willing-to-reproduce partner that they don’t want kids, either, and after basically building their life together, telling to that partner that maybe a kid would be a good thing after all and then divorcing.

This surgery was one of the best things to happen to me ever. I am really happy with my decision. However, some very conservative religious relatives and other such people around me might give me some nagging and whining if they somehow find out that I got sterilized. I still have my Christian faith like I used to, I just won’t make kids. Marriage is not meant to be a Victorian era “Shut your eyes tight and think of England” kind of thing, anyway 😃

  • ren (a they/them)@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Congrats! I got mine about 24 years ago. It was a great decision and a good experience. I love my kids, but knew I was done having more. It’s so nice to not even have to worry about “mistakes” ever again.

    For people considering it, the method I got was absolutely NOT painful or a big deal. The worse part is the awkwardness of having someone mess with your penis when they prep the area (shave and get it ready for the doc). They numb the area, make a tiny incision, and block the tubes from sending mini-yous up and out.

    In the old days, they would just straight up cut the tubes which would be painful, but when I got it done, what they did was only partially cut the tubes to leave some nerves intact then put little titanium clips on the tubes to “keep the drawbridge up” and prevent spermies to passing through. They close ya up and you wear a jockstrap for a few days. Procedure took less than an hour.

    I was nervous it would hurt after and on the way home, I had to pee and I was scared as the pressure was building - but then as I finally peed, I realize it was just the pressure from peeing (dumbass) and I felt great. Went to the company picnic the next day! ha!

    Then a week or 2 later, had to ejaculate in a cup and let them make sure nothing was getting through.

    Easy peasy!

    FYI - orgasms & sex feel and act the same (in fact better without worries of accidental babies), same erections, same cum, same everything, except just shooting blanks.

    • jiml78@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      My comment isn’t to dissuade anyone. I got mine done and if I needed to repeated the procedure once a year with what i experienced I would still do it.

      But I do want to point out that everyone will have different experiences. My vas deferens are/were short so they had a heck of a time getting them into a position where they could cut and put the clips on them. It resulted on what felt like them yanking on them.

      It was uncomfortable to put it mildly. Recovery was super easy.

      I am in my 40s and had all the kids I wanted. I have seem multiple of my friends delay getting one and end up with an oops kid in their 40s. No fucking way would I want to have an infant at that age. It was hard enough when I was 30 years old when my first was born.

      • LoQey@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I’m 41 years old. I had my first daughter 3 years ago, and kid number 2 is arriving in February. (It took me a while to get my life together enough, that I was ready for kids)

        I fully understand, why you wouldn’t want an infant at that age. 🤣