Isn’t the entire point of the profile and matching system to filter incompatible people out? Why can I match with 50 people and not a single one wants to get a coffee or something after exchanging a few pleasantries? Everybody hates these things and yet they refuse to do anything IRL to get off them. Is there some Manchurian candidate activation codeword that I’m missing? I feel like everyone treats this shit solely as an ego booster and actually gets pissed off that anyone tries to interact with them. How do you meet people in hellworld if you don’t drink?

Me after dozens of dead-end back-and-forths that lead to nowhere despite having shared interests and presumably being attracted to each other since we matched: marx-joker

Hmm, maybe it’s the extreme commodification of relationships and atomization under capitalism that prevents you from getting anywhere with this garbage thinkin-lenin

Nope, must be because @[email protected] didn’t say my favorite “The Office” quote and send me a playlist with 50 of the greatest songs I’ve never heard that made me instantly fall in love with them. I have no idea what other people expect from these things but I’m not doing labor for someone that I don’t even know is real. Thanks for reading my rant, any advice is appreciated.

  • Beaver [he/him]@hexbear.netEnglish
    28·
    1 year ago

    I found my life partner on a dating app, and before that used dating apps to successfully hook up with people.

    So take it from me, someone who had the best possible customer experience: they are designed to make you feel desperate and want to use their paid features. That is the only function they are designed to fulfill, every other aspect of them serves that function. If you are having no success with them, please, please don’t despair: there is nothing wrong with you.

    So, what do you do? Well…

    Hmm, maybe it’s the extreme commodification of relationships and atomization under capitalism that prevents you from getting anywhere with this garbage

    Basically, yeah. We’ve fucked up our culture and become so socially atomized that we have way fewer third places and social mixer activities than we should have. Meeting new people IRL requires that we be in situations where we get to actually do some socializing with those new people. That’s why big nerd conventions are such a classic place for new friendships and romantic relationships to start up, because it’s one of the few true social mixers where we have that opportunity for relatively easy socializing with new people (and where we have some common ground to start a conversation about). But outside of that, we really do end up just sitting at home, or going to do hobby stuff with the same people we’ve known for years - not a conducive to meeting new romantic partners.

    So the answer is kinda the usual “capitalism fucked up dating, and also it’s fucking up the bandaid solution that is online dating”