Its just so exhausting and upsetting.

excerpt from a conversation from yesterday (CW transphobia)

Transphobe 1: its too tall!

Transphobe 2: what is?

Transphobe 1 gestures at me

Transphobe 1: that thing

The conversation continued with additional transphobia.

And like i get it okay, im not a person, not even a human, but can we just skip the whole conversation? Or is the whole dehumanization and inflicting pain thing the enjoyable part?

I guess a positive is that it shows who the fake and fairweather allies are, like i was surrounded by people i thought were allies but no one said a damn thing. It was transphobe 2 that actually called out his friend cause ‘you just cant say that stuff anymore’ 🙄. Transphobe 1 proceeded to try and defend his actions by claiming he was using gender neutral language cause he didnt know how to gender me. Like, no motherfucker you fucking werent! Gender neutral language isnt dehumanizing language! Now i get to go organize an event with these same “allies” who said nothing. I demand that you shoot me now, so i dont have to do this.

Im not sure why im so upset about this. Its not that bad, really just par for the course. Not like he was beating me or anything. And allies should be assumed to be false unless otherwise proven. Its just so tiring. So damn exhausting.

Thanks for listening to me

  • Evilphd666 [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    11 months ago

    There was a phrase used before in queer rights and I think it needs to make a comeback because trying to constantly justify your existance is fucking exahusting and I can’t believe we’re back here again. This country just doesn’t learn.

    We’re here. We’re queer. Get used to it.

  • sharedburdens [she/her, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    11 months ago

    Me talking to an acquaintance from organizing I haven’t talked to in over a year

    them: Hi deadname

    me: oh it’s newname now, I’m using she/her now

    them: deadname, newname what’s the difference right?

    me: agony-yehaw

    • Orannis62 [ze/hir]@hexbear.net
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      11 months ago

      Reminds me of how my gf’s dad once told her he was gonna nickname her her deadname so he could continue calling her that. As a funny joke that he also would 100% have actually done if there hadn’t been pushback

  • Amerikan Pharaoh@lemmygrad.ml
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    11 months ago

    Sis, I’d walk tf out on that organization that day. I don’t even tolerate microaggression out of so-called comrades-- that’s that full-on macro cracker shit.

    • lilypad [she/her, undecided]@hexbear.netOP
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      11 months ago

      Ok so like the transphobes were tech people at the location we were organizing at, so not part of the org. But i am considering just dropping the whole org cause people didnt say shit. Like seriously fuck them.

  • kristina [she/her]@hexbear.net
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    11 months ago

    lady if i heard that shit being said about my friends id go rabid and start ripping throats out with my teeth. these “allies” are too busy holding their heads under water

    cat-trans

    • lilypad [she/her, undecided]@hexbear.netOP
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      11 months ago

      Theyd rather drown than stick their neck out. Like, at least transphobe #2 was shutting stuff down, even if it was only out of recognition that its “no longer socially acceptable” or whatever. I guess im also just like having to reorient my understanding of the people who were there, which is dissapointing af.

      Thank you for the trans heart <3