Teachers describe a deterioration in behaviour and attitudes that has proved to be fertile terrain for misogynistic influencers

“As soon as I mention feminism, you can feel the shift in the room; they’re shuffling in their seats.” Mike Nicholson holds workshops with teenage boys about the challenges of impending manhood. Standing up for the sisterhood, it seems, is the last thing on their minds.

When Nicholson says he is a feminist himself, “I can see them look at me, like, ‘I used to like you.’”

Once Nicholson, whose programme is called Progressive Masculinity, unpacks the fact that feminism means equal rights and opportunities for women, many of the boys with whom he works are won over.

“A lot of it is bred from misunderstanding and how the word is smeared,” he says.

But he is battling against what he calls a “dominance-based model” of masculinity. “These old-fashioned, regressive ideas are having a renaissance, through your masculinity influencers – your grifters, like Andrew Tate.”

  • maynarkh@feddit.nl
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    11 months ago

    Yeah, may the almighty line keep going up.

    But that’s beside the point, work is one side of it, my point is that there is no “ideal man” picture out there, nothing to aspire to. The ideal male identity is only described in context of how they treat women. Which is important sure, being kind to everyone, but still, what makes a man these days?

    Kids are asking these questions, looking for role models, and all they see answering is Tate. Everyone else in the mainstream just tells them that their ideal is “not to be a rapist”.

    • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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      11 months ago

      Why don’t boys look up to their fathers? I’ll tell you! It’s because daddy is always at work.

      Girls have the same problem with their mothers also working, but the schooling system has actually (partially) solved the problem. Teaching, especially pre-K, is dominated by women. Even if class sizes are too large for any one female teacher to fulfill the role of a model they still have a huge field to choose from and I think that helps a lot. We need men to become teachers if we aren’t going to liberate men from work.

      • maynarkh@feddit.nl
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        11 months ago

        I get your point. I am not saying I didn’t cry a bit the first time I actually listened to Cats In The Cradle’s lyrics. Or the other times.

        Also, I’d rather have my kid have their own role model, not to have to share a government issued one with 30 other kids. Fuck.

        • queermunist she/her@lemmy.ml
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          11 months ago

          In that case, men need to work less so we don’t have to use pre/elementary/middle/high schools to replace the parental figure.

          Also maybe abolish the nuclear family and go back the premodern gens (i.e. extended family community) so that boys have lots of men in their family to look up to. Even if they don’t have a dad they might have an uncle, grandpa, or one of their 20 older cousins to look up to.

          • maynarkh@feddit.nl
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            11 months ago

            It’s as if you are saying people should be brought up by their families and not mass media, ads and random influencers

              • maynarkh@feddit.nl
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                11 months ago

                This is one of the reasons I’m terrified to have kids. How the hell do you deal with other parents’ failures? Your kid either gets to be a mindless consoomer due to peer pressure, or a social pariah because he doesn’t live his life on a screen.

                Hell, I have problems with maintaining ties IRL. How is a kid supposed to deal with that?