RiotDoll [she/her, she/her]

Woo Fool

  • 2 Posts
  • 43 Comments
Joined 1 month ago
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Cake day: May 28th, 2024

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  • I think I realized how much these cartoons sucked when they left my life and absolutely nothing got worse, and I didn’t feel as though I was diminished for their absence.

    My partner really doesn’t like most pop culture, and especially early in our relationship, we were sharing spaces intended for a single person - single rooms in an apartment and stuff - so we had to agree on a lot of what we consumed - it meant my “adult” cartoons and shit fell to the wayside. South Park, American Dad, that kind of pablum.

    Once we got enough space back that i found myself able to more comfortably revisit this stuff, it never really landed again. It felt irrelevant. It felt shitty. It felt, at times unkind, but really mostly just irrelevant. Most of them have the voice of the older men who make them - a viewpoint I no longer share nor aspire to - and It’s just like… each episode is 20 minutes of my life I could have spent reading, or doing literally anything more interesting.

    The X shit is gonna be one, maybe two seasons of garbage nobody asked for - just another sign of the rising irrelevance of gen x probably.

    For me, I was watching this shit out of some kind of inertia - it was how I had always filled my time, from the earliest days when sneaking south park was a subversive act against my parents - till those early days realizing my partner’s happiness was more important to me than continuing to watch them - I bet anyone still attached to these garbage shows would have a similar experience if they had a similar extended break. It’s just so non-essential.



  • i thought i was pansexual before transition but it just turns out penises are fine when they’re attached to lady’s

    so i’m basically the opposite, where i start turning into a flustered moron every time I find myself around pretty women whereas men routinely make me want to burn down reality itself

    but for a while there when my wires were crossed I found myself enduring the smells and antics of a gender I was priming myself to leave in the dust fully; who knew

    either way figuring yourself out is great



  • I was in love with this girl for a bit in highschool. I’m kinda glad i was too fucked up to really land a relationship, there was a fleeting moment when I might’ve had something with her, but my Gender shit was out of control dysfunctional back then, and any romantic partner I might’ve landed would’ve been dealing with that directly, and I was just too immature besides. I wasn’t the creep though.

    Instead I became a fairly close friend to her, and got to watch her boyfriend at the time gaslight and mentally abuse her. It escalated to it inducing an attempted suicide that landed her in the hospital for several months and almost delayed her graduation. She tried to leave him, and he wouldn’t let her. It got around he had a sadist streak in his intimacy as well, which was actively making things worse for my friend.

    It escalated to a point where several nobodies in particular who considered her a friend, and boyfriends of said - felt they had no real choice but to have him go nowhere in particular under the guise of hanging out, where he was given a very, very clear message about what he was to do, and how he was to comport himself - away from her, forever - lest really interesting things happen to him.

    He wasn’t dumb, he listened, and fucked off. As far as I know he grew the fuck up and has a functional family now - quite the turn around i guess, i’m glad he was smart enough to go down a road where that was possible.






  • I think often about it. To me there’s the life that happens to you, and it’s not necessarily a life that you want or choose. I think most people accept what life brings them, and are largely passive observers of their life. Its not some innate thing like “NPC” language implies - but I think our society is built on people not being too active in choosing their own destiny. for those of us who have “destinies” and circumstances that are contra to our own desires, there is a dysphoria present.

    Overcoming the inertia of life and the expectations present at every level of lived life isn’t easy - at times it demands lurching into uncertainty, danger, and facing the unknown in a way that humans get conditioned to avoid at most costs. But I think I would personally rather die than submit to the mediocrities on offer for my compliance with late capitalism. It’s too much of a spiritual death, a soul death, to bear. There is true living and love for life where finding a destiny we can all abide.

    I don’t have specific answers, but i know the feeling and i know that comporting myself to the influences of the world as it is fucking sucks and is loser behavior




  • I really love that statue. So much soviet art out there.

    As an artist I run in abstraction and stuff, but I really would love a decent style guide to how the soviets made their art - especially their more stylistic propaganda. If anybody knows, maybe i can use my last canvas (i’m a broke girl) to make something honoring the hard carry of ww2 against fascism, so reply @ me with your best soviet style guides since this post is adjacent to soviet art!!!