Even if I could find the language to describe them, which is frustratingly insufficient, I mostly would prefer not to verbalize details. I have found more comfort in focusing on the feelings they elicit. No one can see those dreams, and I’m glad for it.
It’s like how your left and right brain are like two different personalities. One lacks language, so it it expresses itself through imagery. The symbols aren’t as important as the message: I’m scared.
I understand choice paralysis and all that but… for me it’s the loss of joy.
What movies and shows am I excited about seeing anymore? Hardly anything. Another recycled story or regurgitation from franchise obsessed studios. It’s not impossible to find new things to watch, just harder.
Clothes? I work and have to adhere to a dress code of sorts. I have two days a week I get to wear something I like.
Now food can still bring joy at times, but that fridge will not satisfy my anxiety no matter how long I look into it. I used to enjoy waking up to coffee and breakfast. Now I have to work at it to keep it from becoming entirely utilitarian.
I used to read a lot when I was younger. My house has books in almost every room. I buy books still, but can’t bring myself to read them.
These aren’t insurmountable problems, but yeah. It can be hard to find the joy in it sometimes.
The nightmares are not a good time, nope. Focus less on their content. Your brain does weird things when you’re asleep. Try to look into your waking life for answers. For me they’re a sign of anxiety and that I need to address something.
I was just a kid but I did learn about computers in the late 80s. I remember a programming course in the summer that left an impression, though I foolishly never pursued it further.
What I miss most is the wonder. The fascination has mostly all evaporated. Turns out putting a computer in your pocket that your life relies heavily on takes some of the fun away from learning.
I’m trying to recapture it these days by switching to Linux across all my devices and building RasPi projects.
Should have held onto that Lisa II. Probably in a landfill somewhere now, but if I’d known…
Chickens are cold but stalwart in their duties, providing eggs in these trying times. The new pullet is beginning to find her Big Girl voice.
Duncan is a cat. He is doing cat things. 🩷
The puppy loves the snow. She is a big dork. She is also trying out for her role as hat. She will climb on to the back of the sofa and from there rest her head on your head. Dog hat.
Shy cat is hangry, even if she just ate. She will not let you forget that the auto-feeder is always broken and empty even though it is technically full and functioning properly. Her tiny voice speaks only lies.
“We’re wringing our hands as hard as we can”
Next up: an increase in the number of allowed whale decapitations to five (5).
Blood Omen: Legacy of Kain, V:tM Bloodlines and Redemption. Particularly fond of Kain’s VO work in that game.
Monday is one of my days off. It’s a designated self-care day. How that manifests varies. Regular therapy at a minimum.
Fucking grotesque. Hey why not make a lampshade of human skin next time. Sick fucks.
The end of USAID would mean the collapse of American soft power abroad and a decline in American influence. USAID did not always spend money well. It spent billions attempting to reshape Afghanistan in its own image and lost much of it to corruption and foolish nation-building schemes. It paid poppy farmers to grow soybeans instead of heroin-producing plants, paid for security forces who only existed on paper, and spent billions of dollars on roads that did not materialize.
It would have been amazing to have had a serious Congress of adults go through our spending line by line and eliminate wasteful and imperialistic spending. America has been pissing billions away on interfering in foreign countries to further our own interests or line the pockets of contractors while letting her own people starve on the streets.
But this is the definition of throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Besides being illegal, Musk’s takeover is harmful and dangerous. His apple analogy makes no mention of what fruits will be planted in its place. So my assumption is, none. This is nothing but harmful for us and the people that rely on our economic power.
I do enjoy these movies. They’re goofy over-the-top fun dark horror action, elevated by higher caliber actors than they have any right to.
When the first one came out I was still in the thrall of the White Wolf World of Darkness. I remember the rumors about how closely influenced it was by V: tM. During a recent rewatch I remembered how striking and “Garou-like" the werewolf transformations were.
Great stuff.
You can buy liquor from Costco without a membership, and it isn’t packaged in bulk. Prices are most likely cheaper than liquor or grocery stores.
KS brands are made for Costco typically in the same places the name brands are and quality is very decent.
Being honest here, I don’t think this is something to be terribly concerned about. Age is clearly not a defining trait of heartless reactionary conservatism. It happens that a lot of our aging population has turned hard right, and our geriatric politicians show little to no humanity. But they didn’t get that way because they got older.
Greenland’s opinion doesn’t matter to him, never did.
“Hey guys! We won! We control basically all three branches of government! We can do anything we want!”
“Neat! What should we do first?”
“Oh, I know what! Let’s revisit a settled issue and try to rewrite history though performative acts of phony investigation!”
“…uh, ok. But what’s the point? We got everything we wanted. We can do anyth…”
“THEY HURT OUR FEELINGS GOD DAMN IT”
Mildly infuriating?
A generation terrified of Big Brother let the Landsraad and CHOAM set up shop in the back
Doggo is… a puppy. A big, mouthy toddler-raptor who otherwise is super sweet and happy. More snow, please.
New chicken this week. Plymouth Rock pullet is gonna spend some time in quarantine before she meets the ladies in the coop. She is super clingy, likes to cuddle. The other chickens are… cold, cranky and bored. Winter is yuck.
Cat is cat. King of his lil castle. Does not like the new coverlet, tyvm, prefers the soft fuzzy blankets.
He looks like he’s giggling stupidly, while rocking excitedly and watching the school bully pull the neighbor girl’s pigtails.