• MaybeALittleBitWeird@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    The vagina is an elastic organ and the “loose vagina” arguments are just bad women’s anatomy. Besides situations like recent birth or similar trauma or consistently using toys that put Siswet to shame you won’t feel a difference. If you do feel a difference, the problem isn’t the vagina and more likely that you have what the kids would call a “needle dick.”

    • GCanuck@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I’m sorry. Are you suggesting that vaginas all have the same feel? Because as a dude who’s had sex with more than a handful of women, I can assure you that they are all unique. Not saying I could pick out my partner’s out of a blind line up, but to say they are all the same is just bad anatomy.

      And some certainly do “feel” looser. Which is more than likely a direct relation to the arousal than anything being “big”, or something about the kegels. I dunno, I’m not a doctor.

      • circuitfarmer@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I think the argument is that vaginas are not a single size. The same vagina can be different sizes based on a variety of factors. Thus even that same vagina can have a different feel to a male during intercourse based on those factors.

    • cheeseburger@lemmy.ca
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      4 months ago

      So your theory is all vaginas are one size, and it’s only the penises that vary? Right. Why are you being upvoted? Also, OP said nothing at all about bad women’s anatomy or any reasoning for sizes. Put away your jump to conclusions mat.

    • glimse@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      It’s bad women’s anatomy to say that some women are looser but you say childbirth and consistent use of toys will make them looser?

      This is not an insult because the sex was good but I dated a girl who was notably “looser” than the others. Yes, I did notice the difference and no, my dick didn’t shrink when we started dating. She only used vibrators and never gave birth. I think she just naturally had a wider vaginal canal.

      But like I said, it was still enjoyable. Might even say I preferred it.

      I think there’s way too much emphasis on genital size for both sexes. You’d have to be on the extreme end of sizes for it to be a problem

      • Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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        4 months ago

        Same story. Dated a wonderful girl who was noticeably larger in that one department. I’ve also been with some who were noticably smaller. Both situations can cause problems.

    • schmidtster@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I thought I saw a study or some mri images that showed that every vagina is shaped differently. If that’s the case, yeah every single one should be unique and would have a different feel, and there would also be muscle strength difference too.

      Who are the ones arguing with bad anatomy with this new information? I’m pretty sure it was just last year, so why do we constantly spread this misinformation that they can’t be different? Shits wild.

    • DM_me_ur_upskirt@lemmynsfw.com
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      4 months ago

      I think I have the opposite problem. When I’m fully erect my dick gets quite thick, so unless I make my girl extremely horny, it kind of hurts for a few minutes when I get in there

  • Mammalian@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    It’s not about the size of the vulva, but how strong her vaginal muscles are. The grip tightness varies by woman, and you can definitely feel it

  • shalafi@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I’ve thrown my dick in 50+ vaginas, and they’re very much the same. Tall or short, fat or skinny, same. Can’t say that any of them were wider than “normal”, though a very few were a tough fit. And like dick size, you can’t prejudge genitals by outside appearance.

    Wetness varies a great deal, seems more of a defining characteristic than circumference. Too wet or dry can make it hard to get off with the former, hard to start with the later.

    tl;dr: Meh. Most vaginas feel the same, very small differences.

  • Mickey7@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    I would think the questioner means a “looser” vagina. You can definitely feel the difference. You slosh around with less friction. Still fun and it takes longer to finish which isn’t a bad thing.

  • RBWellsV23@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    I want to give perspective as an older experienced lady who has been structurally tight, then had kids, then had to do a lot of exercising and now am strong enough but not structurally tight. Have never (yet at least) had any issues getting slippery.

    Worst of all is structurally tight. PIV was ok but kind of uncomfortable always, couldn’t go for long (not a problem back then because my ex was a quick guy). It felt like my skin was stretching in an uncomfortable and slightly unpleasant way. There was drag, even when I was slippery.

    Last baby was a ten pound bruiser of a newborn and I had to recover my muscle tone. But once I regained the muscle tone, oh yes. That’s it. Flexible structurally (not tight skin) but strong muscularly is the best feeling from the woman’s side. This is when I found I could get off from PIV, can go for longer and can enjoy bigger hung guys, who would have been a flat NO before.

    What’s funny is that this is exactly what my midwife recommended back when I had the first baby. She said to train until you can do fisting, that would prevent damage from childbirth and improve sex, and I thought she was crazy but if I could go back to 20 year old me I would tell her to take that advice.

    • Bell@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Amazing well thought out answer, thank you. It’s what I was hoping to hear from the question.

    • FalseDoubleNegative@lemmynsfw.com
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      3 months ago

      I mean this only in the best way possible: the fact that the female body is literally designed to withstand physical trauma that extreme, and then just be at least as good if not better afterwards, is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Women are literally superhuman, I swear.

      • RBWellsV23@lemmynsfw.com
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        3 months ago

        Yeah I wince at the “lips that grip” pictures; my body did not forget that feeling. And it was terrifying immediately after having kids, if course. But having the skin tightness eased and the muscles toned and a husband hung thicker than average, all of that combined is so pleasurable. I really wish I’d believed the midwife 30 years ago, and would advise any woman worried about ‘staying tight’ that controlled stretching and kegels and lots of sex is a much better long term strategy.

  • kromem@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    There’s a much bigger size difference between a property aroused vagina and one not sufficiently aroused than there is as a baseline circumference difference in my experience.

    So no, this is not something I’ve ever thought of having sex with several dozen different partners.

  • Pizza_Rat@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Yes, there is absolutely a difference. And yes, loose vagina is worse.

    I’m no biologist, but my perception is that the baseline is set by hip width (wider hips --> more loose) but much more important is physical fitness. Strengthening the diaphragm, core, and pelvic floor quickly elevates the experience and makes the baseline irrelevant.

    • EmtptyAspargus@lemmynsfw.com
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      4 months ago

      My ex had crazy wide hips, never exercised, but was so tight it hurt us both.

      Maybe what you’re saying is still true generally, just wanted to throw my experience out there.

    • RBWellsV23@lemmynsfw.com
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      4 months ago

      Outside diameter has nothing to do with interior diameter, that’s not how that works. The whole “childbearing hips” idea is a myth, slender women in general have an easier time with pregnancy and birth. But also tight isn’t always bone structure at all. Vaginismus is overly tight muscles, or the skin can be tight (that’s what I had and it sucked) or being not turned on will make anyone seem tight because not open or slippery.

  • deezcashews@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    Only once. I’ve been told I’m fairly large, but one woman had a vagina that just felt like loose skin all the way in, like all the muscles had atrophied or something. She had kids so I assume it was from that. Some are tighter than others, but that’s the only time I’ve ever encountered that.

    They all feel great though 😊

  • PurplebeanZ@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Yes you can feel the difference between different vaginas, but t’s not just a case of tighter or looser. There are also differences in the texture of the vaginal walls, different depths, different muscle strength/control etc… and even the same vagina will feel different depending on things like arousal/wetness, or where they are in their monthly cycle.

  • DreamDrifter@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    Yes. Every vagina is different, and some are both less textured and larger. Usually the texture makes it not much of a big deal, and other factors matter more

    One girl where it stood out to me (my first time actually). She was also very very wet, and the three aspects together made for a much less stimulating experience. It was incredibly soft and smooth, but it was almost like a silk pillow… I’d push in at an angle and it would feel great, but then just give and slide me back into a loose grip

    I think kegles could easily overcome that though… There’s a lot of muscles there that can make a lot of difference. Not only does it feel better, if you develop those muscles they can twitch involuntarily when the right buttons are pushed (which is a huge turn on), and the occasional squeeze is another layer to interact on

  • Crozekiel
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    4 months ago

    I’ve never broken out calipers in the bedroom… How do you measure the circumference of an elastic band anyway?

    There are definitely different feelings but there are so many factors that enter into it there’s no good way I know of to know the answer to this question. Was it a circumference difference or a muscle tone difference or a lubrication difference or several other possible factors?

    I will say I dated a girl once that used the nuvaring birth control and that was a unique and noticeable different feeling…

  • pickleproject@lemmynsfw.com
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    4 months ago

    I haven’t had this experience across multiple women. However, I have experienced a different feel if the woman uses a dildo that’s thicker than I am. She will feel a little looser for a short time.