My ex-wife only smoked weed once in her life. When she did, she was so relaxed that I think she had been holding onto a fire for about 20 years of her life because she let out a fire. It’s so loud and so long that I echoed off the walls and me being high and paranoid I thought that there was a ghost in the room farting because I could not believe that it was coming from her. I actually started searching for a fart box machine.

As a teen I attended metal concerts on a regular basis. One time I went with a friend of mine and we were at an all day event (something like 2PM until midnight). The venue had a pizza place attached and we ate dinner there around 9. I sharted shortly after (never trust a fart) and I informed my friend. After some laughter we stuck it out til the end and I made it home in soiled boxers to take a shower