For fun, I wanted to set a scene based entirely from a diary entry. I wrote this to the prompt of “Moon”. Now I think it might be fun to tell a whole story this way, but I don’t know that I’ll do that.

Day 3ish X

Funnily enough, the only thing I remember from that fateful day - or night in this case, is the moon. It must have been full because despite being black, it acted as my guiding light. In fact, I don’t remember anything else. But that memory has been burned deep into my mind, it returns religiously – almost like those pesky debt collectors from back home - a continual reminder of my predicament.

You see, I am not home. I woke up in this cave. And I am not… even remotely home as far as I have been able to gather. And I’m not sure what that even means. The grass here is different. The sky. The moon. The trees. Nothing is at it should be. Well, the water is drinkable, and some of the plants have been edible.

Maybe I died. Maybe this is heav. Maybe this is hell. Purgatory? It’s something. Or, maybe I’ve just gone mad, and this is all in my mind - but I refuse to believe that. This is real. My pain is real. All of my cuts, scrapes and bruises from that day night are real.

So, my conclusion is that I have somehow, gone somewhere other than Earth. Maybe aliens brought me here, or God. I don’t know. But I plan to find some other intelligent creature to interact with. Hopefully there are others like me – humans. Hopefully whatever they are, they speak my language…

I don’t know how long I slept last night, through the entire day it seems. In the morning I will set out to find out what I can about this place – I cannot stay here in this cave. I might go mad.

~ Asiné

  • DemBones@vlemmy.netEnglish
    2·
    1 year ago

    Pretty cool story, and the ending is intriguing enough, but the third paragraph has too many formatted words in our opinion. Having too many words in bold, cursive or strikethrough just doesn’t look well. We think that strikethroughs should really be avoided unless used humorously, and even then in little amounts. It really just makes the syntax appear worse.

    • DeadlyEssence01OPEnglish
      1·
      1 year ago

      Hey, thanks for your comment! Since it’s supposed to be a written out diary entry, (with lack of a typical eraser on a pencil) I wanted to try to show the writer’s process for putting their thoughts on paper, so I tried to use formatting a bit more generously than if it were written formally. But I appreciate the thoughts anyways, and it’s something I’ll mull on as I develop the story!