gist of most people who are terminally single is they aren’t capable of offering as much as they demand. so for anyone that is a bad deal. a lot of people simple become parasites in a relationship, financially, emotionally, etc. and those parasitic people will never ever admit fault, they will blame the partner they are sucking the life out of that they aren’t ‘giving them enough’.
I was in a few relationships that became soul-sucking. i used to be depressed and suicidal in the past… because I as in relationships that were sucking my soul out. When I broke up, stayed single, and worked on myself… my life had value again and i was no longer depressed and suicidal.
the issue isn’t about experience. it’s about how you treat other people and if you see your partner as a person… rather than a resource to extract things from (money, sex, attention, etc)
As a 35+ would you rather be with someone who’s had bad experiences in relationships, or no experience in relationships?
I hate to say it, but I think that folks have taken advantage of “be patient of folks with trauma/mental illness/etc.” and turned it into “you HAVE to put up with me or else you’re an asshole who is insensitive to those with struggles.” And nobody wants to be “the guy who wasn’t supportive enough”.
It’s okay to break up with someone if you are too overwhelmed by their needs, regardless of their trauma/mental illness. Staying will make both people absolutely miserable in the long run.
bingo.
gist of most people who are terminally single is they aren’t capable of offering as much as they demand. so for anyone that is a bad deal. a lot of people simple become parasites in a relationship, financially, emotionally, etc. and those parasitic people will never ever admit fault, they will blame the partner they are sucking the life out of that they aren’t ‘giving them enough’.
I was in a few relationships that became soul-sucking. i used to be depressed and suicidal in the past… because I as in relationships that were sucking my soul out. When I broke up, stayed single, and worked on myself… my life had value again and i was no longer depressed and suicidal.
the issue isn’t about experience. it’s about how you treat other people and if you see your partner as a person… rather than a resource to extract things from (money, sex, attention, etc)
I hate to say it, but I think that folks have taken advantage of “be patient of folks with trauma/mental illness/etc.” and turned it into “you HAVE to put up with me or else you’re an asshole who is insensitive to those with struggles.” And nobody wants to be “the guy who wasn’t supportive enough”.
It’s okay to break up with someone if you are too overwhelmed by their needs, regardless of their trauma/mental illness. Staying will make both people absolutely miserable in the long run.
yeah, been there too. i could never understand someone who refuses treatment/therapy/medication and then blames someone else for their struggles.