• mortemtyrannis@lemmy.ml
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    3 months ago

    Ahhh they are inextricably linked to a previous partner and you’re expected to become a parental figure if the relationship goes anywhere serious.

    Some people (like me) really don’t want an instant family.

    I take my hat off to those who don’t have kids but date parents; they are better people than I.

    • I'm back on my BS 🤪@lemmy.autism.place
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      3 months ago

      I wouldn’t mind doing it, but I would have to know the partner really well and feel confident that it would be a stable relationship. I remember having a hard time as a kid when I lost my aunt because her and my uncle had a nasty divorce where she went no contact.

      Pros of dating a parent:

      • You can see how they treat those that are vulnerable and dependent on them
      • They’re typically more stable, conscientious, and responsible
      • Good parents know that they have to model healthy behavior, so they practice those
      • You already know what you are getting with the kids, so it’s not a surprise
      • The kids inadvertently tell on the parent if the parent is misrepresenting themselves up front
      • Can do family activities that would normally be considered odd for only adults to partake
      • The many benefits of being a parent
      • If there’s shared custody, you regularly get time off from being a parent
      • oatscoop@midwest.social
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        3 months ago

        Getting older, with an established career makes spontaneity harder as it is. Add kids to the mix and it’s pretty much impossible.

        I … don’t want that. I like making last minutes plans, 1-2 week long trips, etc. The most limiting factor for me is dropping off my cat at one of my many friends/family members that can watch it (and I reciprocate with their pets).

        If I’m going to date it’s going to be with someone with a compatible lifestyle.