It can be low effort, passive-aggressive, insulting or derogatory towards your convictions.
As a depressed 16 year old boy I received a self help book from my mother. I was offended. Never opened the book. Like in hindsight I guess she thought I needed help and the book would somehow do that, but all I saw was that my mother thought something was wrong with me.
Cop gave me a speeding ticket for my birthday. I’m counting it as a present because he said, “Happy Birthday” when he gave it to me.
My aunt only ever knew one thing about me, that I grew up liking Harry Potter. First I got all the books, split across two years. Then I got all the movies as they came out, up to the 5th one. After that I was apparently too old for her to know what I liked, I got a gift card to a gas station for 3 years in a row. I mean hey $20 in gas wasn’t a totally awful thing as a late teenager, so I guess it could have been worse.
My weird alcoholic grandma that my dad doesn’t really talk to got me a shaving kit when I was 10.
Most of you didn’t get me anything at all last year!
The address on my restraining order isn’t current. Get me your new address and I’ll get you.
Something. I’ll get you something.
You never came to collect it dude.
My mom once gave me a cat litter scoop like this one
in my Christmas stocking. This was not, to my knowledge, in the context of a conversation about needing to clean up after the cat more often, but for all I know it was her way of subtly trying to get the point aside.
Missmatched socks.
Not just socks. Missmatched, ugly socks !
Life.
I knew my marriage didn’t have much left in it when for my birthday my wife gifted me a bag of candles that had been half eaten by the kids.
I feel bad for the kids, those candles must have been waxy and disappointing.
Nah! They’re used to dollar store candies, so I just tell them it’s a candy bar. They love the scented ones, a real treat.
At this time of year I imagine alot of peppermint and pumpkin spice flavors
my mother got me a desk light and then immediately stole it for her quilting because it was full spectrum white
I got it back years later when the thing holding it up had gotten so loose you needed to duct tape it
We had an optional secret santa in 5th grade, meaning no kid was forced to participate if they didn’t want to. It ran the month of December, you were supposed to give 1 gift a week. The first week I got nothing. The second week I got a single marble. The 3rd week I got a single pencil. The 4th and final week I got a tin of Royal Dansk Danish butter cookies. As a 5th grader, it was the biggest fucking letdown, especially when all the other kids were getting candy, toys, etc, every week.
Store bought pudding, no clue what I was supposed to do with that.
Eat. That’s what you usually do with pudding. /j
A fruit roll up. Some time a few months before christmas, my sister and I were fighting over the last fruit roll up in the box. She got it initially, but I got it in the end. She put it in several boxes Matryoshka style, added weight making it seem heavier, wrapped it, and put it under the tree. Imagine my surprise, after going through several layers to find that fruit roll up. Worst. Christmas. Ever.
At least it was thoughtful.
I asked my Aunt for R.E.M. at the height of their popularity. She gave me an old REO speedwagon album that had none of their hits on them. All in all, that’s the worst, so i’ve done very well.
Got the same crappy t-shirt several years apart from the same person.
