So i still have depression and im constantly bored, i feel like a loser who cant do anything right. I want to let my creativeness out, make something i can share with the world or family, but im probably dreaming too big. I cant stand being depressed and bored, it stinks, everyone tells me to work out but i lack the motivation to do so.
i usually just watch youtube all day while complaining to family members that have no idea what to do about me.
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Hiking.
I cannot stress this enough.
One of the biggest loops of depression is feeling anhedonic and drained of energy, which keeps you from doing stuff, which keeps you anhedonic and drained of energy.
Go for a hike literally every single day for a whole month. Rate your depression on a scale of 1-10 every day a week before you start, every single day during, and then every day for a week after. You’ll see the trend, and hiking will be your new antidepressant.
It’s easy. It’s walking. It’s not competitive, you can go hilariously slowly and still accomplish your goal. You can add hobbies to this hobby, like photography or bird watching. You’re probably not getting enough exercise, and being depressed all the time blows.
If you’re nerdy and depressed, you may have heard about EMDR, where you sway your eyes back and forth rhythmically while you think about trauma. The doctor who came up with the treatment (that’s showing crazy good results) went down the rabbit hole they went down because they noticed walking in the woods helping their depression. They currently think the mechanism has something to do with bilateral stimulation (walking) and constant reframing of your perspective (tree on my right, tree on my left, rock on my right, rock on my left).
Other physical activities are great too, but hiking seems literally taylor made for the depressed.
Do you struggle with anxiety and destructive ruminative thought patterns? Guess what you won’t have the energy to do when you’re panting for air?
Hiking is a legit way to maintain depression indefinitely. Don’t get cozy, though. take a break and your brain will find its way back to it’s old antics.
Walking, or running, is good for your brain in almost every way. My depression was/is coupled with social anxiety so it was hard to get myself to do it but things like walking to the grocery store instead of biking/car helped me change that into ‘I’ll take a detour’.
The worst hobbies for me are the ones that are done sitting still, or anything that ‘creates’ a different ‘reality/world’. For me that was anything behind my pc. Woodworking is better for me and allows me not to worry about social stuff but walking is definitely better for my brain.
This was an amazing help last year when my wife was had really bad PTSD symptoms from a medical crisis she had. We walked 3+ miles almost every day last fall through January. She started getting better around then, and we started shortening our walks to 1 mile a day throughout the spring.
Now it’s over 100°F every single day and we are stuck inside for at least another month. Luckily she’s doing well these days, but I do miss our walks.
Save up for a hiking trip together 😁
Oh wow, I didn’t know the theory behind EMDR, but I’ve had great success treating my anxiety and depression with both EMDR and hiking. Makes a lot of sense!
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Start with a walk around the block 😊
In case Reddit goes down, the account/comment gets deleted, or you just don’t want to click the link:
/u/ryans01: Ouch. Sounds like you’re having a tough time max. That sucks. I’ve been there, so I kinda know what you’re talking about. I’ve been in the ever circling vortex of self doubt, frustration, and loathing. It’s no bueno. I know. If you don’t mind lemme tell you a couple things. You can read em if you want, read em again later if you feel like it. But honestly man, if I spend all this time typing this out to you and you don’t let it be a little tinder for your fire, well, you’re just letting us both down. And you don’t HAVE to do that. You don’t HAVE to do anything. But you get to choose.
(Who am I? My name’s Ryan and I live in Canada. Just moved to a new city for a dream job that I got because of the rules below. I owe a lot of my success to people much cooler, kinder, more loving and greater than me. When I get the chance to maybe let a little bit of help out, it’s a way of thanking them. )
Rule numero uno - There are no more zero days. What’s a zero day? A zero day is when you don’t do a single fucking thing towards whatever dream or goal or want or whatever that you got going on. No more zeros. I’m not saying you gotta bust an essay out everyday, that’s not the point. The point I’m trying to make is that you have to make yourself, promise yourself, that the new SYSTEM you live in is a NON-ZERO system. Didnt’ do anything all fucking day and it’s 11:58 PM? Write one sentence. One pushup. Read one page of that chapter. One. Because one is non zero. You feel me? When you’re in the super vortex of being bummed your pattern of behaviour is keeping the vortex goin, that’s what you’re used to. Turning into productivity ultimate master of the universe doesn’t happen from the vortex. It happens from a massive string of CONSISTENT NON ZEROS. That’s rule number one. Do not forget.
La deuxieme regle - yeah i learnt french. its a canadian thing. please excuse the lack of accent graves, but lemme get into rule number 2. BE GRATEFUL TO THE 3 YOU’S. Uh what? 3 me’s? That sounds like mumbo jumbo bullshit. News flash, there are three you’s homeslice. There’s the past you, the present you, and the future you. If you wanna love someone and have someone love you back, you gotta learn to love yourself, and the 3 you’s are the key. Be GRATEFUL to the past you for the positive things you’ve done. And do favours for the future you like you would for your best bro. Feeling like shit today? Stop a second, think of a good decision you made yesterday. Salad and tuna instead of Big Mac? THANK YOU YOUNGER ME. Was yesterday a nonzero day because you wrote 200 words (hey, that’s all you could muster)? THANK YOU YOUNGER ME. Saved up some coin over time to buy that sweet thing you wanted? THANK YOU. Second part of the 3 me’s is you gotta do your future self a favour, just like you would for your best fucking friend (no best friend? you do now. You got 2. It’s future and past you). Tired as hell and can’t get off reddit/videogames/interwebs? fuck you present self, this one’s for future me, i’m gonna rock out p90x Ab Ripper X for 17 minutes. I’m doing this one for future me. Alarm clock goes off and bed is too comfy? fuck you present self, this one’s for my best friend, the future me. I’m up and going for a 5 km run (or 25 meter run, it’s gotta be non zero). MAKE SURE YOU THANK YOUR OLD SELF for rocking out at the end of every.single.thing. that makes your life better. The cycle of doing something for someone else (future you) and thanking someone for the good in your life (past you) is key to building gratitude and productivity. Do not doubt me. Over time you should spread the gratitude to others who help you on your path.
Rule number 3- don’t worry i’m gonna too long didnt’ read this bad boy at the bottom (get a pencil and piece of paper to write it down. seriously. you physically need to scratch marks on paper) FORGIVE YOURSELF. I mean it. Maybe you got all the know-how, money, ability, strength and talent to do whatever is you wanna do. But lets say you still didn’t do it. Now you’re giving yourself shit for not doing what you need to, to be who you want to. Heads up champion, being dissapointed in yourself causes you to be less productive. Tried your best to have a nonzero day yesterday and it failed? so what. I forgive you previous self. I forgive you. But today? Today is a nonzero masterpiece to the best of my ability for future self. This one’s for you future homes. Forgiveness man, use it. I forgive you. Say it out loud.
Last rule. Rule number 4, is the easiest and its three words. exercise and books. that’s it. Pretty standard advice but when you exercise daily you actually get smarter. when you exercise you get high from endorphins (thanks body). when you exercise you clear your mind. when you exercise you are doing your future self a huge favour. Exercise is a leg on a three legged stool. Feel me? As for books, almost every fucking thing we’ve all ever thought of, or felt, or gone through, or wanted, or wanted to know how to do, or whatever, has been figured out by someone else. Get some books max. Post to reddit about not caring about yourself? Good first step! (nonzero day, thanks younger me for typing it out) You know what else you could do? Read 7 habits of highly successful people. Read “emotional intelligence”. Read “From good to great”. Read “thinking fast and slow”. Read books that will help you understand. Read the bodyweight fitness reddit and incorporate it into your workouts. (how’s them pullups coming?) Reading is the fucking warp whistle from Super Mario 3. It gets you to the next level that much faster. That’s about it man. There’s so much more when it comes to how to turn nonzero days into hugely nonzero days, but that’s not your mission right now. Your mission is nonzero and forgiveness and favours. You got 36 essays due in 24 minutes and its impossible to pull off? Your past self let you down big time, but hey… I forgive you. Do as much as you can in those 24 minutes and then move on.
I hope I helped a little bit max. I could write about this forever, but I promised myself I would go do a 15 minute run while listening to A. Skillz Beats Working Vol. 3. Gotta jet. One last piece of advice though. Regardless of whether or not reading this for the first time helps make your day better, if you wake up tomorrow, and you can’t remember the 4 rules I just laid out, please, please. Read this again. Have an awesome fucking day ☺
tldr; 1. Nonzero days as much as you can. 2. The three you’s, gratitude and favours. 3. Forgiveness 4. Exercise and books (which is a sneaky way of saying self improvement, both physical, emotional and mental)
What a comment! Love it so much. Just trying to do something today - the act of trying is the most important thing
I used to hike. Been feeling down lately. This is a great reminder, thank you
If you want to throw stuff while hiking, Disc Golf is for you. Honestly I owe playing disc golf much appreciation to getting out of a big slump I was in and losing weight. It’s like hiking, but with a mini game built in.
Came here to say this. If you have anyone in your life who would be willing to keep you accountable by being your hiking buddy, that helps me a lot. Before my partner and I got together, she was my friend who liked hiking and got tips from a Facebook group on good locations. Every weekend, she had picked a place for us to go. Since I didn’t want to let her down, I got my ass out the door. I never regretted a single hike because they were all to great nature spots.
I realize this is limited by geography. I’m lucky to live in a place with a lot of great trails. I used to live in a place that was flat and uninteresting, so this depends on having access to nice trails.
Little things that make solo hikes even more enjoyable:
- Merlin Bird Sound ID app.
- Bringing one piece of hard candy with you
- If you must listen to something, get earphones with a transparency setting where you can still hear birds and leaves crunching under your feet
- A dog
And if you like to compete with yourself, dish golfing. It’s cheap(at least it can be), and it’s basically competitive hiking :)
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Running too. Almost every activity that makes you sweat can trigger the EMDR effect, and of course has a load of knock-on effects too
Start playing a musical instrument. Works for me
i second this and recommend Piano/Keyboard.
A cheap Keyboard is probably found for 40-50 bucks online and it is a good starting point to also get into the music theory.
Still the skill ceiling is practically endless.
Keyboard is good. I personally would recommend bass guitar if you like rock music. If you can save up $200-300 and buy a used Squire Precision or Squire Jazz bass, it will literally last you years as long as you change the strings regularly and learn how to do an at-home setup.
You can pick up the basics and start jamming with people really fast, but the skill ceiling is deceptively high. Bassists are the hardest to find in any band.
The instrument is fun as hell too.
Same. I’d go crazy without piano / guitar.
100%
You’ll feel great teaching yourself an instrument. Dive right into it. Look up simple things at first, and practice it. Then look up another thing that you don’t how to do and practice it. The time goes by fast and before you know it you realize you understand it.It’s an amazing feeling.
Running!
I was clinically depressed from 2002 to 2017. In 2017 I lost coverage and was forced to stop taking my medication.
The medication was wellbutrin. It really helped. I hated that I couldn’t get access to it, but I had to face life without it.
After having ramped down off the stuff, I was okay for a couple of weeks then the darkness started to come in.
In my research I found that exercise does the same thing as my medication (it increases hippocampal volume). So I switched from running about 1 mile per week to about 25 miles per week.
And my depression was gone. The medication managed it, allowed me to live my life. The running destroyed my depression.
IMO depression is caused by brain atrophy, which is caused by lack of moving one’s body. We evolved to be moving so much more, and just like your muscles will atrophy if you’re bedridden, your brain will atrophy if you don’t exert your body. Shrinking brain means life sucks hard.
I’m glad running has worked for you, but the perspective that depression is a caused by a lack of movement seems dangerous. It implies fit and active people can’t be depressed because they are active. That’s just not true.
Activity can help lift someone out of depression, but it’s not a cure all barrier between you and the world of mental health.
Okay, fair enough. That’s a good point to bring up. I think that’s one stable path to depression and I think that if a person has never been in good shape that should be their first thing to try after they’re stabilized from any acute danger. (Meaning if the shit’s bad enough just take meds to get out of the hole and be able to operate).
Maybe their brains are atrophied, maybe those regions are losing processing power, or for some other reason signaling freeze-inducing threat.
I think the most proximal cause of my depression, at least, is a feeling of overwhelm and hopelessness, that’s so chronic it just suppressed me across the board. And for me, that overwhelm came from normal life, being fed through a hippocampus without enough processing power to plot a path through it all. I couldn’t be sure, so I slowed down across the board, ie became avoidant and unmotivated.
So what I tell myself is that the growth of the hippocampus allowed me to just handle more complexity before it sent the overwhelm signal to the rest of my brain and caused a shutdown. Instead I got to operate more freely with more confidence that I was on solid ground, because I could see better.
But the prediction and seeing wasn’t the most proximal cause. Being able to see better made me more confident, lowered my stress response, lowered my physiological alert level.
But for someone else it could be their hippocampus shrank for some other reason. Or it’s inflammation cause by a food, and that cuts the processing power down. Or unconscious or conscious mental conflict, sapping processing power.
And it doesn’t even have to be the hippocampus. That’s just one input into the emotional system. Presence of abuse or enemies, presence of hopeless circumstances, straight up cell malfunction with neurotransmitters, all sorts of shit can go wrong.
I do think hippocampal atrophy is one of many possible paths to developing depression, and I don’t want to give the impression that what I said was a totally complete model.
It’s my model of how it happened to me, and I think it applies to a large fraction, possibly even half, of the root of people’s depression.
And I’m basing it on three things:
- How completely and utterly it worked. Better, more complete eradication than the meds had ever accomplished. (though I’m thankful for the years they helped me and the first moments they lifted me from the muck)
- How totally ignorant I, and apparently all my practitioners too, had been of that effect
- How drastically little activity I was doing, as a result of exerting myself in exercise maybe once every couple of weeks. I’d do it as a quick pick me up from time to time, not as an ongoing habit.
First and foremost I want to second anyone who brought up cooking. Learning to cook a meal perfectly to your tasted is both accomplishing and sharable.
For the geekier stuff, I have taken up Gundam model kits in the last year. You can start off with simply building them straight from the box. There are also a ton of ways to customize them such as repainting, adding decals, create “weathering” effects and “kit bashing” (mixing models together to make your own new model). It has been a very nice outlet whenever I want to be crafty.
I’m going to need you to elaborate on the Gundam model kits. Any good resources for getting started? Any recommended kits for beginners? Is it an expensive hobby?
There are lots of guides on YouTube but this should suffice.
Costs are sort of just down to how into it you want to get. Kits range from $10-$300. I usually build ones in the $30-$80 range. You can get lots of fancy tools but really, just get a decent pair of sidecutters and a hobby knife (exacto or other brand) and maybe a sanding stick. I actually started with a nail polishing block that you can get at any store that has nailpolish.
Kit wise, really just start with a HG (High Grade) or EG (Entry Grade) that looks cool to you. If you find you enjoy the process more than the end product you can get into RG (real grade) or MG (Master Grade). All but MG are a 1/144 scale while MG is 1/100 scale. MG and RG are much more intricate.
As a last word of caution, the earlier RGs were not designed very well, each kit has a number, currently their are ~40 of them with the last 10 or so just being tiny MGs. The earlier ones can be great but need a bit more love to get right.
My personal favorite kit I have built is the RG Hi-Nu Gundam
Here is an alternative Piped link(s): https://piped.video/Idm7mt98enM
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source, check me out at GitHub.
I second Gunpla, it’s incredibly mindful to just crank some tunes and clip runners, sand nubs, and slowly watch something come together that seemed impossible from flat plastic. Then you see the articulation and and even more blown away by the engineering of it all.
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To add to this, if you’re not too coordinated and are struggling with the smaller skateboard and doing tricks… try longboarding! It’s like skating, but without the stigma of being capable of doing tricks.
Plus they’re INFINITELY more comfortable to cruise around on. They even made drop through decks that are designed for long distance cruising
It’s like self harm but you look sick as hell doing it.
Above age 25 it’s more like assisted suicide rather than self harm lol.
Knitting, crocheting, embroidery, cross stitch, etc. The work is meditative, and you get in a groove waiting to see what the next row or stitches will look like. Producing an object feels productive, and gives a feeling of accomplishment.
Choose bright colors and fun patterns, and it’s a lot of fun. There are patterns for all interests, so don’t think this is the realm of only little old ladies. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
There are also a lot of kits that include most of what you’ll need (especially for cross stitch). It can be a really convenient way to start and most kits come with really good instructions on how to cross stitch too.
Frisbee golf. It’s cheap, fun but challenging, and outdoors. Worst case scenario, you go on a long walk and bump into some interesting people. If you’re in a medium sized city or larger, there is probably a course and league near you.
The culture is generally very polite and fun to be around. Lots of harmless stoners and 30yo bearded people with beers in hand. In the south there is starting to be some influence from megachurches using it as an enticement, so I’m not sure if it’s “cleaned up” a little more down there.
Very solid answer. Just make sure to watch a couple YouTube videos tutorials on how to throw correctly so you can quickly make.progress toward being good enough such that you don’t just lose your discs every time you throw them. It’s a lot more fun when that annoyance is less frequent.
Hiking. It costs nothing and you can create your own meaning from it. You can do the same trail over and over and know the place intimately, or you can make it a goal to do as many as possible and keep track of them all with souvenirs or art or whatever you want. The benchmark for success is what you define. And it’s got a bonus of being good for your body.
I’d also suggest traditional music, but maybe keep it simple and cheap… ukulele, didgeridoo, or tin whistle. It’s a low bar for entry and it’s inherently social, all about jamming and being inclusive. Didgeridoo is more solitary, if that’s what you prefer. These instruments have almost no ongoing costs and are great for learning the basics of music.
Instruments arr both humbling and also affirming. You can make noticeable progress and, again, define your own success. All my best friendships came through playing music. It’s an endless source of joy for me.
I’ve only known the hike “as many different trails as possible” method but am intrigued by the “make one trail your own” method.
For me getting back into LEGO really helped, it’s a nice and relaxing activity. Also depending on your interests a hobby like flying FPV quadcopters can be a lot of fun. Forces you to go outside too which is always good :-)
I also got into Legos when I was depressed. In general, working with your hands helps with depression.
I see a lot of physical activities around here, and I strongly agree. Find something that gets you outside and makes you move around. Hiking, biking, running, team sports, climbing - all great. Find whatever suits you and is within your area.
I recently got into disc golf. It’s something i look forward to play, and it makes me go outside often and I meet a lot of new people while playing.
I had a conversation with a coworker recently and we got to the topic of working out, and he told he’s working out two times a day. He goes to the gym before and after work.
I asked him why the hell he would go twice, like that’s just ridiculous and he said well he was depressed, and started working out. Everyone said it’d help with the depression, but it helped only a bit. So he figured well maybe he has to go even more.
It’s absolutely ridiculous imo, but… whatever helps one I guess
The endorphins from working out do absolutely help a ton. Though 2x a day is certainly excessive lol.
If one of the two sessions is cardio, then it’s not too bad. But yeah, lifting weights twice a day would be extremely difficult to recover from.
Go exploring. On whatever mode of transportation you prefer, in whatever area you like. Set small goals for each trip (this is important to keep you from just wandering completely aimlessly). Maybe try to find a new restaurant of a cuisine you’ve never tried. Maybe find a street or alleyway you’ve never visited and see what’s there. Maybe go find the biggest tree in the park. Basically just go see what’s out there.
If you struggle coming up with your own fun goals, try geocaching instead.
I used to ride my bike a lot when I was young to the point where it became my automatic thing to do whenever I was feeling stressed/anxious/depressed. The adventures I went on, while also being outside in nature and in the sun (or moonlight) would always pick me right back up.
I only realized this recently as I’ve had a huge urge to buy a bike again but didn’t know exactly why.
Making food, either baking or cooking. They focus you on the here and now and you eat well to boot.
A hobby that has helped me a lot is knitting. It’s simple to learn and it’s another truly mindful thing to do for you.
I second cooking!
Adding to all of the other comments, I have to add to the music suggestions: You DO NOT even have to learn an instrument. Learn how to make electronic music (you don’t have to make techno or other such electronic electronic music. Just lay down a drum track and add a little sound here and another there. YouTube is full of tutorials for full blown DAW’s/workstations and the simplest apps. Get Koala Sampler or some other app for your phone or better yet, tablet.
Even simpler, try an app called Keylimba, the default sound is a soothing thumb piano/marimba, and for just a couple euros/bucks you can get a range of instruments. With it you can just have the thing loop whatever base you put in and just, pluck a sound here and there. I’m a half-pro musician and I still often find myself just relaxing with it. Making a simple chord structure and just chilljamming away. Music isn’t hard and difficult, people/society just approaches it in a really backwards way. Anyone can do music. Sequencers and loopers are such an underrated tool for learning. You don’t have to mind any theory at all, just do what feels good.
I also have to add - meditation. Get a calm album or find one on YouTube that has music you enjoy, or even look up a guided meditation on YouTube, there’s tons. Meditation is great if you can find even a moment to focus/unfocus on it.
Learning how to DJ is another good way to get into the world of music. The first time you get two songs to smoothly blend together feels like magic.
Then when the time comes to buy turntables, learning to scratch is even more rewarding. But don’t go spending any money just yet. Start off with a free copy of Virtual DJ, and learn the basics with a mouse and keyboard. The hardware comes later when you decide that you’d actually like to pursue this hobby. At that point you’ll have to decide if you want to go with Seraro, Traktor, or Rekordbox. They all have their niche uses depending on what kind of DJ you want to be. But start off with VDJ first.
Yep, in my highschool/college depression days, making YouTube videos on music production helped me keep my head up.
Photography.
You can set up a little studio area in your house and start with still life pictures. Search for Danish Still Life Paintings for some ideas - I’m sure there’s plenty of YouTube rabbit holes for more ideas. Or, just take up painting!
Photography is also a great excuse to get out of the house and walk around. Whether it’s street photography or landscape or close up nature photography, there’s always something to take pictures of. Give yourself little assignments - just circles today, just signs, just shadows, etc.
Either way, this is a creative outlet that you can share with others as you progress and get better. Who knows, you might start printing your images and have a gallery showing at a cafe!
