Congrats sis!

I just hit week 5 with estradiol patches. For me in the last few weeks physically:

one of my nipples has been very sensitive, the other only mildly.

my body emitted absolutely no odor for the first 30 days on the HRT and then last week one morning i just had a new totally different body odor. It goes lovely with the feminine deodorant products and i’m very chuffed about it because I smell a cute girl nearby but then she’s me!

My facial hairs are noticeably growing in slower now which is nice i get hardly any five o’clock shadow. (from the spiranolactone though not the E, also i have zapped my face a couple times with a braun IPL which it says not to do but reviewers said does work and hasn’t hurt me yet)

Either my pores are smaller or the skin care routine is working bc my skin is super smooth.

my hair is definitely improved but i switched from 1 old spice product to 3 sheamoisture products and have been doing scalp massages so idk how much of that is from the E.

orgasms are different and the exciting parts of porn are very different

mentally:

I feel super peaceful and connected in general my anxiety is a lot less, I’m talking to people in shops more and have been making friends. My taqueria lady and I exchanged names today and she’s going to help me with my spanish classes. Lessons started today! Before E I was pretty withdrawn and depressed a lot so it’s really nice to feel so good every day.

I have been doing laps at the park every day and prisoner squats every day, I just added flex arm hang and bench dips to my park mornings and all of that is helping me fit into the girl clothes nicer so that is also really helping my mood and ability to interact with others. I hated exercise before but i really really enjoy self care now and seeing the gains.

Lets get my old transition journals out. I have photos, of my progress for month 1 Month 3 and month 4 in this entry but later have month 9 and 12 but I think it’s a violation of the forum rules to upload them however. “Old Selfies” maybe. Let me know if I’m wrong I will upload the photos with this journal… I can also continue if you want but this should be enough for now. While everyone is different you can expect some bits like this… Maybe.

Month 1 (I can feel it but nothing to be seen.) January 2008

I reported feeling tried, and strange like my head was crammed full of cotton wool, for 2 weeks it was hard to focus weeks my depression subsided over the month and I felt very calm. I could Feel “something strange” shifting inside me by week 3, My sense of smell changed, as did my sense of taste. I preferred salty foods more and my sense of smell became much stronger, My libido started to drop after week 1. My nipples were more sensitive and maybe looked slightly chafed. My own scent began to diminish rapidly, I already had long hair pre-hrt I noticed that I was producing much less scalp grease by week 3, my hair had become glossy and shiny.

Month 2 (The shape of things to come.) February 2008

“The Foggy headedness has subsided and now I feel much more emotionally switched on and like I’m experiencing my life for the first time. The first change, My nipples had grown slightly larger. a hard “nut” can be felt behind them sensitivity has increased in the area.” I report my body and facial hair are growing slightly slower, my hair remains smooth and glossy for an abnormal length of time, my hair would before get greasy within 12 hours of washing, I report not having washed it for 4 days and it still looking fluffy and smooth. I make a comment about* “how long haired women recommended only washing their hair once a week to protect it’s length but I couldn’t understand how. clearly this is how.”* I note another physical change, My skin is in patches starting to become softer, I noticed it between my toes as I rubbed them together doing my homework. Libido has completely vanished.

Month 3 (Signs.) March 2008

I undeniably start growing breasts most of this entry is devoted to this. By the midpoint of the month I noticed sensitivity increasing rapidly in my chest, my nipples have increased in size again, The “Nut” now the size of a small golf ball. “Roots” can be felt growing from the “ball” into my chest. I mention 3 instances of me incapacitating myself.* “when I was getting ready for uni, I pulled my backpack forward then let the straps snap back to seat the bag more centrally, it catches the edge of my chest by my armpit the pain is extreme and am staggered by it.”* I also later have a door clip my chest, when opening it with my hands full and similarly drop the plate of what I was carrying. A week later I describe noticing my breasts for the first time, the night before I’d struggled to sleep because my chest was itching intensely, scratching and squeezing it caused a momentary shock of arousal… The following morning I shower… and our student shower is faulty, the shower-head has a tendency to “blow apart” when turning on. Which happens to me, I’m pushing my arms infront of me as I’m assembling the shower head when I noticed them, I have boobs, Very small. but undeniable.

Month 4 (Angst) April 2008

Less changes my transformation has slowed, my nipples got larger again and are “unusually large” for any passing male they poke out puffily. I try to present feminine I hadn’t done so since I was 18 (I was now 22 in my journals my birthday begin in month 2) I look horrible, nothing like how I was before “alittle boyish but passably a girl” before. I become distraught that I might get stuck looking like a freak gender forced to disfigured breasts, I consider if I’d made a mistake and will I like an ugly caveman. my breasts haven’t grown larger and my anxiety is quite bad this month. I want them to both get bigger and also not get bigger. (I was doing this in secret at university) I get severe dysphoria again about my face angsting at every slight particular focus on my forehead (I’m actually sensitive about this even today.) and how I should have just been braver and come out when I was 18 and transitioned then. I beat myself up more in this post. It’s not a nice entry.

This journal continues upto 1 year and 2 months… and things get pretty spicy later when I get outed disowned then start passing… but I’ve already longposted enough :P