Speaking with The David Difference at the 58th Annual Cauliflower Alley Club Reunion (via Kayfabe Friends), Sting was asked to comment on what was next for him.
“I signed a multi-year deal with AEW, obviously not to wrestle anymore, but it’s like a licensing deal, a legends deal if you want to call it that. So I’ll do appearances with them on and off, depending on what they want and all. I’ve done real estate, I did real estate before I ever was a pro wrestler, so I’ve always loved real estate. A lot of people say, ‘Oh, are you a real estate agent?’ No, I’m not an agent. I’m an investor. I was flipping houses before before flipping houses was a term. So I made money in real estate before wrestling, so I’m doing that again, and I love it," Sting said.
“Yes my name is Mr Borden, if you follow me I’ll show you around. As you enter we have this beautiful staircase–”
<Darby faceplants on the ground behind them after leaping off the staircase>
“That’s just my son ignore him, now the kitchen is over here…”
That sounds like WBD’s next hit reality show. Have Darby gut a rundown place using nothing but his own body and a skateboard, then Sting comes in and remodels it. Bonus points if they can get Hacksaw Jim Duggan to deliver the lumber.
Sting has to be dressed in a high vis shirt and blue work pants, but keeps his facepaint on, sometimes he’s surfer sting, sometimes he’s joker Sting, but he’s never wolfpac Sting… Never wolfpac sting.
I always thought wolfpac sting made him look like his face was made of candy. I always wanted to bite his face. But then he would have been like “Ow! Kid, why are you biting me???” And I’d be like “YOU’RE NOT MADE OF CANDY CANES YOU BIG LIAR!!!” and he would be confused.
I’d watch the shit out of that.
“Now you’ll notice that these floors and stairs are all solid oak. Just recently installed after some recent fire damage.”
“Oh, was it faulty wiring? Is there any issue we should be worried about?”
“No no. Nothing like that. This used to be the childhood home of Swerve Strickland, and then his coworker burned this place to the ground after a workplace disagreement.”
“Oh my! That sounds like an HR nightmare!”
“You have no idea! Now if you’ll follow me into the kitchen, I’ll show you the kitchen island with not only an oven, with stovetop, but also a dedicated indoor grilltop with grill hood. You’ll be pleasantly surprised where we placed the spicerack. Spoiler alert, it’s a game changer, and it’s not where you might think…”
The house, or the show?
The show. lol
Oh. Well that’s a bummer. Because the show doesn’t exist. But Sting will TOTALLY sell you a house!
I’m a millennial retail worker, I can’t afford a house. lol