When I was 19, I had friends from high school who were still younger, and one of them was my friend Julie who had helicopter parents (she would have been 17-18). I was doing security at an event where the radio headsets we had were super-shitty, and the guy running security was a dumpster fire on his own. Julie’s parents forbid her from going to the event, and grounded her to her room. Then her dad called the hotel where the event was being held, was told Julie had “run away” to this event, and that I was somehow responsible. Given she was a minor, the event runners were understandably concerned, although they were frustrated that Julie’s dad was unable to describe her in a way that was useful: “Asian, wearing black, or a tee-shirt, or something. Ask Punkie where she is.” So they contacted the head of security to find me on my rounds to see if I knew what this crazy man was talking about. The head of security said “okay” and did nothing.

At some point, the head of security was fired for a variety of reasons, and this increased the level of miscommunication. Meanwhile, Julie’s dad was calling every few hours, demanding to know where his daughter was. And soon there was a concerted effort to find me, which was complicated because of the communication issues. By the time someone found me and the connection was made, my response of, “I have no idea, Julie said her dad forbid her coming here,” was not what they wanted to hear, and met with skepticism “You’re not hiding her, are you? Like she ran away with you in some tryst? She’s 17 and you’re 19, that could have legal ramifications!” No. We’re platonic friends, I don’t know where she is. if I tried to bonk the poor woman, she’d clobber me.

Meanwhile, Julie’s dad finds Julie in her bedroom, right where he left her. Julie later told me that she was ignoring her dad calling for her, and didn’t “come downstairs” like he demanded because she assumed it was a trap to get her punished for leaving her bedroom while she was grounded. So naturally, her dad assumed she wasn’t in the house. Because he called for her and she didn’t answer.

Poor Julie. Her parents were crazy-nuts.

I remember this one. Someone else lost him, but he knew where he was and wanted to be there.

“Help! I’m trapped in the mountains! I’m freezing and starving to death.”

“I understand, sir. But for a small fee of just $30 a month, your computer can be protected from viruses.”

Sounds like the average lemming! One of us!

I have set my phone to silence always, I don’t want to answer anyone in my free time 🤷🏻

I get the logic. If it’s some random ass number and you’re stranded with no charger, why waste time on what might be a spam call? That and I don’t want one of the last things I hear to be someone talking about car insurance

unfathomably based behavior

Fucking spam has ruined another communications medium.

Sometimes places call me and it already has their info despite them not being a contact I have saved. Like they have a name not a number, and even a pfp that isn’t a colored circle with a number or letter in it. If I was lost and got a call from the fire department that said it was the fire department I think I might pick up.

I don’t know how that system works tho. Do you have to register somewhere? Like the opposite of the old white pages where you had to opt out instead of in?

I could see them doing that just because they were trying to conserve battery power, however, if they were still getting a signal, couldn’t they have still used their map, and thus, weren’t really lost? Or was this in the Dark Ages, before smartphones guided us to the light?

That’s his first mistake, taking the phone into the woods.

edit: Hey gang it’s me, dipshit. I made this comment in jest originally, because the guy wasn’t really using it as a rescue device to begin with, and because there are some legitimately good reasons why you may want to leave your phone at home or in the car, depending on your goals. Assuming you want to survive, yes, you’ll probably want to bring your phone with you but depending on your equipment and certification you may have even better options.

If you’re going an area where you know you’ll have service, taking a phone is a great idea unless your goal is to connect with nature and you feel the phone is going to get in the way of doing so (e.g., disconnecting from work or spending all day in your tent on the phone). If you take your phone with you and you have spotty service, try getting to a clearing or some view of a developed area or city - your phone is up so high that it’s going to have a pretty good chance at reaching some signal especially on LTE. Basically you have more signal “strength” and a greater distance with each foot you ascend.

If you plan to do this sort of thing often, you should probably get a device made for this sort of thing - one that has the ability to send short messages to 911 which can be done via satellites and not land-locked cell towers; one which has GPS and relays your coordinates to 911 or your friends / family at the push of a button. This comment not sponsored by Apple but the latest iPhones have this capability too.

If you’re going to do this sort of thing as a group at a large gathering like a festival or other event where you suspect the cell towers may be overloaded (e.g., burning man) you can use 900mhz mesh devices which support encryption such as meshtastic.org devices. This is a more diy solution but it allows your friends to have the p2p messaging via your phone’s bluetooth connection and the device, acting as a bridge to others.

There’s also satellite phones if you think you’ll need more than just basic 911 sms services out whereever you’re going. Or, if you have a ham operator’s license you can use portable equipment to talk to the next city, county, state or country over depending on a lot of factors.

It all depends on your goals.

“I may die but I have principles” -the hiker probably

But seriously, there are people that are in an emergency that do not make rational decisions at the moment.

Absolutely me, lol

Life imitates meme.

me_irl